Me and myself
Member
Hi group
After my gf brake up our relation I have been analysing it so that I can do the "balance" between the pros & cons.
I could identify some issues which I must work on so that I can enjoy more my next relationship.
However, some things are not clear yet for me and I would like to know your oppinion and, above all, what would you think and what would you do in case this happened to you.
So, let's say you meet this girl and, as soon as you start a relation with her, the following things happen:
- On your first night of love she says to you that, until that day, she has been sleeping with her ex-boyfriend altough she doesn't want any relationship with him anymore.
- She tells you she doesn't want a long term relation
- She tells you that I can not find what I want in a relatioship with her (I came from a marriage that ended almost 7 years ago)
- She don't want you to be seen, by her friends, together with you. The justification was that she doesn't wants to do that until she knows that the relation is strong (their friends might start to think "Oh, another boy friend!")
- She tells you if someone do her something that she wouldn't do to another person, she would finish the relationship right there (ex, getting late to meet her without call her (It never happened to me but this was an example she told me)
- etc, etc
Now, imagine she tells you these things in the first two weeks of our relationship and it was told, not in a caring way, but with a "warning" tone instead.
Looking back to the relationship, all these things made me fell insecure enough to spoil the relationship, by being always acting with extreme caution, and that made show a person who is cold and affraid to take a more intimate gesture like hold her hand, give her a hug, give her a kiss, etc.
Basically, it seems that while I was looking to find the good things in her, she was looking to me trying to find the bad things.
How many of you can identify with me? What would you think? What would you do?
After my gf brake up our relation I have been analysing it so that I can do the "balance" between the pros & cons.
I could identify some issues which I must work on so that I can enjoy more my next relationship.
However, some things are not clear yet for me and I would like to know your oppinion and, above all, what would you think and what would you do in case this happened to you.
So, let's say you meet this girl and, as soon as you start a relation with her, the following things happen:
- On your first night of love she says to you that, until that day, she has been sleeping with her ex-boyfriend altough she doesn't want any relationship with him anymore.
- She tells you she doesn't want a long term relation
- She tells you that I can not find what I want in a relatioship with her (I came from a marriage that ended almost 7 years ago)
- She don't want you to be seen, by her friends, together with you. The justification was that she doesn't wants to do that until she knows that the relation is strong (their friends might start to think "Oh, another boy friend!")
- She tells you if someone do her something that she wouldn't do to another person, she would finish the relationship right there (ex, getting late to meet her without call her (It never happened to me but this was an example she told me)
- etc, etc
Now, imagine she tells you these things in the first two weeks of our relationship and it was told, not in a caring way, but with a "warning" tone instead.
Looking back to the relationship, all these things made me fell insecure enough to spoil the relationship, by being always acting with extreme caution, and that made show a person who is cold and affraid to take a more intimate gesture like hold her hand, give her a hug, give her a kiss, etc.
Basically, it seems that while I was looking to find the good things in her, she was looking to me trying to find the bad things.
How many of you can identify with me? What would you think? What would you do?