wickedstepmother
Member
Hi everyone,
I have a feeling this jealousy story will be different than most... I'm not jealous of any women in my husband's life -- I'm jealous of my stepson. In brief, my stepson is now 16 and lives with us for the most part. Recently he's become an honours student and has started a rock band with some friends. One of the friends' father owns a recording studio and has connections in the music world. OK, here's the insane, irrational jealousy part: I am pathologically jealous of my stepson's success. On some primitive level, I fear that his success will make my husband value him more than the two kids we share together. I wish my stepson the best, but I DON"T WANT HIM TO DO BETTER THAN MY KIDS! I've always valued academics and music, and to see my stepson unexpectedly excelling in these areas is killing me. I always hoped that * I * would be the one to offer music to my husband via our children (who are, in fact, very musical, but they're still young). I'm fully aware of how crazy this must sound. Imagine being jealous of a stepson's success! But my feelings are very real, and are sometimes crippling. I HATE feeling this way. I wish I knew how to "rewire" myself so I didn't have these anxiety reactions every time my stepson has another success. I'm currently on antidepressants and undergoing cognitive behavioral therapy in an effort to handle/overcome the feelings. In the meantime, ANY insights at all would be greatly appreciated.
WSM
I have a feeling this jealousy story will be different than most... I'm not jealous of any women in my husband's life -- I'm jealous of my stepson. In brief, my stepson is now 16 and lives with us for the most part. Recently he's become an honours student and has started a rock band with some friends. One of the friends' father owns a recording studio and has connections in the music world. OK, here's the insane, irrational jealousy part: I am pathologically jealous of my stepson's success. On some primitive level, I fear that his success will make my husband value him more than the two kids we share together. I wish my stepson the best, but I DON"T WANT HIM TO DO BETTER THAN MY KIDS! I've always valued academics and music, and to see my stepson unexpectedly excelling in these areas is killing me. I always hoped that * I * would be the one to offer music to my husband via our children (who are, in fact, very musical, but they're still young). I'm fully aware of how crazy this must sound. Imagine being jealous of a stepson's success! But my feelings are very real, and are sometimes crippling. I HATE feeling this way. I wish I knew how to "rewire" myself so I didn't have these anxiety reactions every time my stepson has another success. I'm currently on antidepressants and undergoing cognitive behavioral therapy in an effort to handle/overcome the feelings. In the meantime, ANY insights at all would be greatly appreciated.
WSM
