Paging your therapist

[Rosa]

Recently I was sooooo overwhelmed with memories and wanting to do harm to myself that I paged my Doctor. To me I'm thinking it probably sounded sooooo stupid (yes I have alot of issues with feeling stupid) but the truth is I just wanted to hear his calm voice. I also had this need to tell him 'they hurt me'. It was the first time I ever expressed myself this way and it was so very important to me that he hear those words. He was great about it and called me back and calmed me down. Does this seem stupid to others? I know I have issues with feeling stupid but last time I wrote about crying at services I got all kinds of good responses that helped me feel differently about myself.
I never had paged him before and I guess I think since my life wasn't in danger I probably shouldn't have bothered him but at the same time I felt like I needed to,
Rosa

 

[David Baxter PhD]

I think if he gives out that number it's because he is okay with it being used from time to time. I would caution you not to overdo it but knowing it's there if you need it can be reassuring.

 

[Rosa]

Thanks Doctor, I guess you have a point about him giving out his pager number. I wouldn't take advantage of it. He was fine with my calling, I guess I just feel dumb for needing to hear him voice. Its not that I have strange feelings towards him, but I knew he would be calm and I just needed that calm at the time. Next time I'll be taking the klonopin faster which should make such calls unnecessary,
Rosa

 

[Peanut]

Rosa, my therapist always tells me to page him, every session. I told him I didn't feel comfortable doing it but he keeps encouraging it. I know how you feel, it is hard to know what constitutes and appropriate page and when you shouldn't. It sounds like paging him in your situation was appropriate though and it helped you so I don't think you shoud worry about it. It sounds like it was good that you did.

 

[sunset]

My Dr gave me his cell phone in case I need him. I have used it a couple of times when I was really needing his input and he was fine with it. I try to keep it to emergenices though as I dont want to take advantage.

 

[Rosa]

Thanks everyone. I do feel better about this. Your all right-he wouldn't give out his pager number if he didn't want such calls and he did help me that night so I think I did the right thing. I'm glad others understand that it is hard. The last thing I want to do is intrude in his life but at the same time I guess thats the nature of his business and as long as its not abused it is ok.
thanks again
Rosa

 

[Diana]

It sounds like you have respect for your doctor and that you wouldn't take advantage of his pager. But, what's really important to me is that you DON'T think you're stupid. Even if your doctor had never given you his number, you were in a situation in which you weren't sure where to turn. This doesn't make you stupid in any way. If your doctor didn't give you his number, then maybe your actions would have been innappropriate, or not the best choice, but not stupid.

 

[Rosa]

Thanks Diana, I appreciate your feedback-especially for addressing my 'stupid factor'...thanks for saying I wasn't stupid.? I do feel better about paging him-afterall it worked, he was able to put me in a better state of mind and I did not cut myselt which was huge. The truth is I've began being completely honest with him about what I'm feeling and thinking and this was a perfect example of how out of control things can get for me-covering it up wouldn't have been a good idea and this way he was able to help me help myself to pull me out of that state of mind.? To quote Martha (Stewart) 'its a good thing'.? Thanks
Rosa