Relapse

[Ashley-Kate]

hello,
i am in a bit of a problem actually a big one i have been going through lots of stress lately and i am having a really hard time to control my e-d habits . and well i have been able to stop weighing myself constantly because i was asked to do so by my nutritionist but i weighed myself today and as the results of that shocked me i look back on my week and realize that well i have restricted in great amount my food consumption up to only having coffee. and lots of water . i don't know how to say it but it is like it all happened without me realizing it. i just don't even feel hungry anymore .. the stress has cut my already small appetite to nothing and i don't now how to just et myself to start eating again it is as if i am conscious that i am in an anorexic pass and that in this pass i feel that i am on a high of some sort but at the same time i know i need to get out of it . but the thing is for the past couple of weeks all i have been doing is just this when i get out of an anorexic phase i fall into a day of bulimic behavior and then go back to restriction... i just don't know what to do.
Ashley

 

[Cat Dancer]

Re: relapse

Are you still seeing that counselor? Is this something you could discuss with her? I struggle with anorexia/bulimia too and I'm just taking it one day at a time the best I can. It's stressful, but I think being nourished is an absolute key to obtaining a better outlook on life. If that makes any sense. It's hard to overcome depression when your body is starving for nutrients. I know anorexia/bulimia are disease themselves and cause our reality to be distorted, but sometimes taking little, tiny steps toward health is all we can do.

If your health is very in danger, perhaps hospitalization is an option. I know that's scary, but sometimes it might help a little.

Your nutritionist should be able to at least help you come up with some kind of eating plan.

I know this isn't much help, but my thoughts are with you. I do understand how very hard it is.

 

[Ashley-Kate]

all my logic points out to yes i need to eat but the gesture of just basicly eating is simply too hard .
yours trully
ashley

 

[Daniel E.]

What about sipping some Ensure or another high-calorie drink?:

Small things like drinking Ensure or carrying around non-stress foods to snack on in very small portions in order to keep your energy up during the day.
Again, don't expect too much from yourself right away. Sometimes I freeze ensure into ice cubes and just suck on them during the day. It all depends on what YOU need.

http://forum.psychlinks.ca/showthread.php?t=5991&highlight=ice+cubes

 

[Ashley-Kate]

the word that sticks out the most in that snetence to me is high calorie. i have a hard time just putting milk in my coffee let alone drink ensure..
i know i seem like i am helpless and in some wayi may be i just don't know how to stop the anorexic voice in my head to tell my body i can eat!
ashley

 

[Daniel E.]

Well, sometimes fear can be a motivator, e.g. the fear of hospitalization, feeding tubes, etc. Personally, with my depression, the dread of having the same problems five years from now is a big motivating factor to make positive choices.

 

[Daniel E.]

More positively:

Look back towards the beginning of your relapse -- what was going on in your life during that time? Was there a lot of stress involved with your parents, friends, school, etc? If you can find out what triggered the relapse, you can start working towards fighting the battle. Along with finding your true self, you also have to learn to deal with any stress or problems in your life through other things that don't involve self-destruction. Instead of purging and starving to regain control and to feel better, you have to develop better coping mechanisms for life. That's a part of breaking free from an eating disorder and a relapse...Please talk to someone about what you are going through with your recent relapse. You do deserve to recover and so does anyone in here that is still suffering. Everyone deserves to LIVE, no matter what.

Life with an Eating Disorder - HealthyPlace.com

No matter what your head tells you, it really is okay to have extra support during the rough times.

Sometimes what helps people from relapsing is making a list of things they can do instead of starving or purging. Things like cleaning, playing with an animal, going on the computer, talking with a friend, going camping, listening to your favorite CD, and so on can help.

How to Prevent Eating Disorder Relapses - HealthyPlace.com

only having coffee. and lots of water .

The coffee is obviously a bad idea since it acts as an appetite suppresant.