...Probably not, but it's cool
It's been almost a year since I last logged on, though I've always checked in periodically just to read. And I do want to say that I really appreciate the help and kind words I have been offered to me from the members here in the past, I really like this website - the information and the great people.
I'm going to add an update of what happened throughout the past year or so, at the end, but first my question since I know not everyone, if anyone, will want to read the update but would be willing to answer my question. Anyways....
My Question:
Do the urges to SI ever stop? I haven't hurt myself(well, not intentionally) in a long time, since I posted on here that I told my parents after it had gotten to the point I was scaring myself and I decided I needed to quit for my own good after about four years of doing it regularly, but every now and then I still want to. It's an easy urge to dismiss now, doing something, anything, for a few minutes will usually make me completely forget. It's more annoying than anything, I've never really considered acting on it, so I was just wondering if the urges will ever stop, even if it takes a few years, or if its just something that'll stick around as sort of a 'tick' from my past?
My update if anyone would like to know/cares:
A fair bit has changed in my life since I first posted here. I've had no thoughts of suicide in a good long while, have kept with my pledge to avoid self-injury though it was hard at first, I've completely dropped the drugs and the drinking I got involved with, I changed groups of friends - I decided the friends I had been hanging around weren't the best of people and were contributing to the depression. While hanging out with my 'new'(I had always known them) best buddies isn't always trouble-free(We go to court tomorrow for something not too bad - Wish us luck!) they've really helped me a lot, they were the ones who stepped up and convinced me drugs weren't the way to go, they're the ones who are always there and I'm always comfortable around them. And probably hardest yet most important, I've developed the self-confidence that I am something, I am important to someone, that I WANT to live, that it's all worth-while even through all the pain. My physical health has been pretty bad recently though and therefore I haven't been able to get out with the dogs, one of my favorite things to do, but I still love them as much as ever, who knows where I'd be now if I didn't have the dogs to help me through the rough spots. The only really noticeable bad in my life now is that I still am a horrible procrastinator and simply do not have the ambition to do much more than 'get by' in school, also I'm very jumpy as if someone's going to hit me and I flinch when most people move around me but my best friend's mom has been helping me get over that.
It sounds so cliche, but it really is like to a great deal that I've developed into a different person, I mean, my personality's generally the same, but I'm much more emotionally and socially healthy I guess is what I mean, it's so much different from how I was in that aspect.
That is all, I have clearly not lost my knack for ridiculously long posts in a year.
Anyways, thank you for reading and I hope someone can give me some insight on my question.
It's been almost a year since I last logged on, though I've always checked in periodically just to read. And I do want to say that I really appreciate the help and kind words I have been offered to me from the members here in the past, I really like this website - the information and the great people.
I'm going to add an update of what happened throughout the past year or so, at the end, but first my question since I know not everyone, if anyone, will want to read the update but would be willing to answer my question. Anyways....
My Question:
Do the urges to SI ever stop? I haven't hurt myself(well, not intentionally) in a long time, since I posted on here that I told my parents after it had gotten to the point I was scaring myself and I decided I needed to quit for my own good after about four years of doing it regularly, but every now and then I still want to. It's an easy urge to dismiss now, doing something, anything, for a few minutes will usually make me completely forget. It's more annoying than anything, I've never really considered acting on it, so I was just wondering if the urges will ever stop, even if it takes a few years, or if its just something that'll stick around as sort of a 'tick' from my past?
My update if anyone would like to know/cares:
A fair bit has changed in my life since I first posted here. I've had no thoughts of suicide in a good long while, have kept with my pledge to avoid self-injury though it was hard at first, I've completely dropped the drugs and the drinking I got involved with, I changed groups of friends - I decided the friends I had been hanging around weren't the best of people and were contributing to the depression. While hanging out with my 'new'(I had always known them) best buddies isn't always trouble-free(We go to court tomorrow for something not too bad - Wish us luck!) they've really helped me a lot, they were the ones who stepped up and convinced me drugs weren't the way to go, they're the ones who are always there and I'm always comfortable around them. And probably hardest yet most important, I've developed the self-confidence that I am something, I am important to someone, that I WANT to live, that it's all worth-while even through all the pain. My physical health has been pretty bad recently though and therefore I haven't been able to get out with the dogs, one of my favorite things to do, but I still love them as much as ever, who knows where I'd be now if I didn't have the dogs to help me through the rough spots. The only really noticeable bad in my life now is that I still am a horrible procrastinator and simply do not have the ambition to do much more than 'get by' in school, also I'm very jumpy as if someone's going to hit me and I flinch when most people move around me but my best friend's mom has been helping me get over that.
It sounds so cliche, but it really is like to a great deal that I've developed into a different person, I mean, my personality's generally the same, but I'm much more emotionally and socially healthy I guess is what I mean, it's so much different from how I was in that aspect.
That is all, I have clearly not lost my knack for ridiculously long posts in a year.
Anyways, thank you for reading and I hope someone can give me some insight on my question.