• Quote of the Day
    "It is only too easy to compel a sensitive human being to feel guilty about anything."
    Morton Irving Seiden, posted by Daniel

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butterfly tattoo.
That beautiful butterfly, when you are sixty years old becomes a pelican, with the effects of our old enemy...gravity,,,:D"Decisions made impulsively are those often most regretted"...Old Fogey's Handbook
 

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And there are many proactive options that are much better than any of the above.

If hair-shaving, hair-coloring, piercing, or tattooing could do what you wish it could do, psychologists and psychiatrists would be out of business.

and I would have saved hundreds of dollars....maybe thousands...cause none of that stuff is cheap, and I've done it all...
 

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You're never too old. You just rebel slightly differently than you did when you were 17.
 
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Well, what I would really like is a convertible. LOL. But I don't have the money for that.
 

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If I still lived in Ottawa I'd consider a convertible. But here, we only get six weeks of summer. I'm still trying to figure out why I live here, except that I'm allowed to have a pig here, and I wouldn't be in Ottawa.
 

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I guess I'm too old to do something rebellious which is how I feel. :eek::eek:mg:

The way I see it, Janet, you could use that spirit of rebellion, or perhaps better described as wanting to assert yourself, by chanelling that emotion and energy into positive actions that would improve your life, rather into actions that would squander time and money without making a significant difference.

One way you could assert yourself and make a difference in your life would be to make it clear to those people in your family who denigrate you and who refuse to take you seriously that you intend to make your own decisions about your life, your healthcare and the future of your children.


You could assert yourself by seeking out a competent medical practitioner who can help you deal with your illness, and then assert yourself by committing to whatever you need to do to regain your mental and physical health.

You could assert yourself by getting the legal aid required to ensure you receive the services to which you are entitled and deserve, not only for yourself but also for your children.

These are major life changing decisions you would have to make and commit to, and feeling rebellious is a good and healthy start.

What's important is that you use that energy and motivation for actions that will improve your life.

Becoming healthy and independent will improve your life....... a tattoo, a piercing or pink hair might get attaention, but can't change a thing in the way you live your life, in my opinion.
 

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They have no-pig by laws. Somehow the politicians are allowed to stay though......:coffee:

hehe :)

Also......

"no pig" by-laws, or

no "pig by-laws"?

If pigs ARE allowed in a place, I certainly hope there are pig by-laws to keep them in check...

Pigs are clever and fabulous enough to slowly take over, if there aren't any pig bylaws... such as, no pig politicians.

Does Jilly have a streak of Hillary Clinton-esque charisma?
 

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Oh my gosh,so true. Someone has GOT to make some by-laws about pig in-laws. I'm actually shocked nothing has been done so far.
 
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I'm scared. I feel very worn down mentally and physically and devoid of any ability to deal with the problems in my life. I feel confused and unsure and like maybe I'm just making everything up. I don't have the clarity to know what to do. :(
 

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I have been having that urge to do something to my hair,I keep having this image in my mind of taking scissors and holding my hair up and cutting it all off.

To help with the compulsion,I marked a date on the calendar,to go have it cut.When I go in the bathroom and want to get the scissors,I remind myself of that date,and so far I have been able to not do it.

But I have anxiety,and I keep thinking if I would actually do it somehow the anxiety will subside.Like it will be a release or something.

Please wish me luck that I will be strong enough to keep fighting this stupid urge!

---------- Post Merged at 10:30 AM ---------- Previous Post was at 10:25 AM ----------

And this movie clip is stuck in my mind.Only I imagine doing it to myself instead of someone else doing it.

 
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Oh dear.... :(

If you feel like doing it that way, that seems more like you are punishing yourself...


If you do end up cutting your hair, I hope you can do it in a calm, loving manner. Or heck, if you wait for the appointment... It can still be a release, but it will be done with conscious effort, pride, and TLC... Not like skinning an animal or causing a feeling of shame or humiliation afterward...

I acted like that, too, when I was a youth. I would cut or rub my skin until it bled with pretty much the same expression as Mommy Dearest in that clip...

I think it was frustration and anger that was all pent up and I was misdirecting it.
 

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I want to hold out until the date on the calendar.But,I may end up going to a salon sooner than I planned if I just cannot beat this urge.I don't want to cut it myself,I know it will look horrible if I do.

I really just want to wait until the date though,it's 2 months away,because it will be my birthday then.I want getting my hair cut to be something good,something special and not some kind of compulsion or punishment.
 

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No idea if this is helpful or not,but I wonder if you might enjoy looking at some magazines, pictures or styling videos for a shorter length, when the urge gets bad? Maybe that could let you obsess a bit about it,but in a good way - like thinking of new looks you'll enjoy if you manage to wait and let it get cut in a chosen style at the salon - rather than at home.....?

Wish you luck! There really are some nice styles for shorter or bobbed hair in the last few years.... Cool jazz-age style accessories for short lengths too.
 

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Thanks,but I really don't think that would help.I don't want to have shorter hair,and the thing is,I don't want to look good when I am feeling this way.It's always more of a 'I'm going to chop my hair up and make it look horrible' urge.

The urge is still there today. But instead of trying so hard to fight against it,and fight against actually doing it,I am telling myself I can cut it if I really want to,it's my hair,I can do whatever I want to it.It's just hair,it will grow back if I chop it off.It wouldn't be the end of the world if I did.

That is making the urge have less power.

Maybe just accepting that I have urges to do things that I don't really want to do works better than trying so hard to fight them......
 
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How bout this? Get a pile of Barbie dolls or some cheap knock-offs, with long hair... Grab a pair of scissors and chop off some of their hair... Do your worst on the first Barbie, then get progressively less frenzied. Then on a few dolls, cut some hair gently and nicely and style it...

Either that, or I wonder if you could find something like a shrub that needs trimming and hack the heck out of that. Because that would exert a lot more energy to do and might be more satisfying. Or a shovel to some dirt. Hack it up...

I like that you have a good strategy there, LIT, with accepting the urges are there, but not going along with the urges (because they are thoughts and thoughts don't control you)... I also like how you remind yourself even if you do cut the hair, it's gonna grow back... Excellent!!
 

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