More threads by stargazer

ThatLady

Member
I hadn't seen this. Thanks so much for posting it, stargazer. I watched it, often in tears, to its end. It's an amazing chronical of the suffering, and the euphoria, to which this disease can subject its victims. It's sad, it's compelling, and it's thought-provoking.

Mr. Frye, in appearance and in presentation, reminds me so very much of my dearest friend. Tom died of cancer several years ago, but he was my soul-mate in many ways. His wife and I are still the dearest of friends; although, she lives quite a distance from me, we still keep in touch. Tom was bipolar, as well, but never so severely as those who bared their souls for this series.

As I've said before, my daughter is bipolar. She's had some very difficult experiences, and these clips brought back those times for me. They're behind us now, and she's doing well. Interesting, though, I find myself realizing that many of the symptoms Mr. Frye mentions early-on, I have suffered, as well. Although I was diagnosed only with major depression brought on by my daughter's attempted suicide, I find myself wondering if, perhaps, the seeds for her disorder lay in me all along. If so, I can count myself amongst the lucky ones as my disease state (major depression or bipolar, whichever it may have been) seems to have passed, or at least reached a level of synergy that allows me to live a normal, happy, healthy life.

Thanks again, stargazer. This post gave me a gift. Now, if only I could reach out a hand to Connie when she finds herself unable to move forward. I wanted to do so so very badly.
 

stargazer

Member
Although I was diagnosed only with major depression brought on by my daughter's attempted suicide, I find myself wondering if, perhaps, the seeds for her disorder lay in me all along. If so, I can count myself amongst the lucky ones as my disease state (major depression or bipolar, whichever it may have been) seems to have passed, or at least reached a level of synergy that allows me to live a normal, happy, healthy life.

You're certainly a success in that regard, ThatLady. I have also often wondered how much of my bipolar stemmed from my mother, whom I believe was probably bipolar but who dealt with it through a stringent self-discipline. Also, I and others have wondered about my daughter, though she also seems more disciplined, more focused now than ever. But when I think that way, I am tempted to attribute my illness to my own severe lack of discipline, and I know that this over-simplifies the case.

So far, I've only gotten to the Carrie Fischer interview. It was starting to hit too close to home, and I had to put it aside for a while. I'll try and pick it up again tonight.
 

ThatLady

Member
Well, my daughter isn't my biological child. She was born to my ex-husband by his first wife. Our marriage wasn't the happiest part of my life, to be sure. The only good thing in it were the children. I guess I was wondering if any of this could stem from "modeled" behaviors, or things the kids were subjected to because of my unhappiness, and my way of handling that unhappiness. I know that bipolar disorder is supposed to be genetic, but I can't help but wonder if any of it could be brought on, or triggered, by the living environment.

I don't really know anything about my daughter's mother, so I don't know if the disorder ran in the family, or not. I guess that's what set me to wondering.
 

stargazer

Member
I really don't know, ThatLady. Maybe Dr. Baxter has some insight on this. I can only guess that certain painful influences from our environments at any early age might affect the choices we make early on, and then later become conditioned into our overall thought patterns at an unconscious level.

I know that in my case, I found at an early stage that a certain kind of perception or thought-experience was too painful to sustain, and I created ways to re-route it, so that my thoughts would detour onto something more pleasant. It had something to do with receiving mixed messages from my parents, but I think it's going to take a long time for me to get in touch with what it was exactly. But it seemed to cause me to gravitate toward artistic projects and other diversions, such as solving mathematical problems or trying to figure out the genealogies in the Old Testament, at an early age. So I think those kinds of escape behaviors were definitely environmentally influenced.

It might be that later on, some of the same thought processes, when taken to an extreme, manifested in mania. I don't really know. I have noticed, however, that my daughter does much the same thing. And this is something that she and I have discussed on occasion.
 
Stargazer,

Its a very good documentary it was broadcast sometime last year on BBC TV here in the UK. Stephen Fry is someone who I have tremedous respect for many reasons.
 

Miette

Member
Thank you so much for posting that stargazer. It was very moving it did a great job of highlighting the different options and respecting everyone's choices. I really appreciated the compassionate treatment of the subject as well.
 
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stargazer

Member
I must confess I haven't gotten to the end yet. I've been kind of busy lately; also, I found the portions interviewing the more manic sorts rather hard for me to watch, because it was like looking at an aspect of my own behavior that I haven't quite come to terms with. But I'll ease into the rest of the documentary pretty soon.
 
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