Inception and Mindfulness - CounsellingResource.com
By Gordon Shippey, MA, LAPC
The recent blockbuster film Inception asks “how can we tell the difference between dreams and reality?” But how often are we “dreaming” with our eyes open each day? Without effort, we can not only lose touch with what’s going on around us, but sink deeper and deeper into troubling worlds of our own construction.
In Inception, operatives invade the dreams of their victims. Even more mind-bending is their ability to enter additional layers of dreams within the dreamworld. As bizarre as this may sound, you’ve probably done the exact same thing. Suppose you had an argument with a friend. As you head off to work the next day, the argument may be replaying over and over in your mind. And let’s say the argument was about how you behaved at a party the prior week. Suddenly you’re re-living that moment. Perhaps what happened at the party was caused by an earlier event which then becomes your focus. With little effort, you’re already three layers “deep” in this daydream, and none of the levels are likely to be enjoyable or useful.
Lost in Time
Our minds are also prone to escape into the past or the future. While reminiscing about good times past or reviewing mistakes to learn how to improve are good uses of this ability, too often we find ourselves mentally stuck in a past that we have no way to change. Similarly, while planning is an essential skill, future expectations can set us up for disappointment or fill us with fears that may never materialise. “I am an old man,” said Mark Twain, “and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened.”
Stories
So much of what makes these daydreams painful is not what happened but the meaning attached to what happened. For instance, if you’re expecting your spouse home by 10 pm and they don’t appear, how you feel about this depends on what you think this event means. Is you spouse late because of their absent-mindedness and irresponsibility? Then the result will be anger. If you suspect they were in an accident or became a victim of violent crime, then fear will grip you. If a vision of your partner cheating with someone else were to enter your mind, then rage and jealousy emerge.
Another classic trap is assigning enduring personal meaning to events in our lives. Failing to get a job can trigger thoughts of worthlessness and hopelessness, even though there are many reasons for not getting a job that have nothing to do with personal qualities. It’s one thing to be responsive to feedback but quite another to begin thinking and believing as if every negative event is caused by some personal shortcoming.
Wake-Up Call
Destructive daydreaming — becoming trapped in a memory of a memory of a memory, dwelling on past injustices or fearing future failures, or building terrible stories about actual events that may or may not have any basis in reality — creates intense suffering for many of us. Escape from these nightmares is among the strongest reasons to develop your own mindfulness. As I’ve written elsewhere, mindfulness does not require a great deal of time or space. (See Three Steps to Everyday Mindfulness.) In fact, it can be as simple as asking yourself several times a day: am I “awake,” that is, am I paying attention to this present moment and the task before me? Or are my feelings and thoughts elsewhere? Just asking the question on a regular basis may provide the “jolt” you need to move another step towards awareness.
By Gordon Shippey, MA, LAPC
The recent blockbuster film Inception asks “how can we tell the difference between dreams and reality?” But how often are we “dreaming” with our eyes open each day? Without effort, we can not only lose touch with what’s going on around us, but sink deeper and deeper into troubling worlds of our own construction.
In Inception, operatives invade the dreams of their victims. Even more mind-bending is their ability to enter additional layers of dreams within the dreamworld. As bizarre as this may sound, you’ve probably done the exact same thing. Suppose you had an argument with a friend. As you head off to work the next day, the argument may be replaying over and over in your mind. And let’s say the argument was about how you behaved at a party the prior week. Suddenly you’re re-living that moment. Perhaps what happened at the party was caused by an earlier event which then becomes your focus. With little effort, you’re already three layers “deep” in this daydream, and none of the levels are likely to be enjoyable or useful.
Lost in Time
Our minds are also prone to escape into the past or the future. While reminiscing about good times past or reviewing mistakes to learn how to improve are good uses of this ability, too often we find ourselves mentally stuck in a past that we have no way to change. Similarly, while planning is an essential skill, future expectations can set us up for disappointment or fill us with fears that may never materialise. “I am an old man,” said Mark Twain, “and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened.”
Stories
So much of what makes these daydreams painful is not what happened but the meaning attached to what happened. For instance, if you’re expecting your spouse home by 10 pm and they don’t appear, how you feel about this depends on what you think this event means. Is you spouse late because of their absent-mindedness and irresponsibility? Then the result will be anger. If you suspect they were in an accident or became a victim of violent crime, then fear will grip you. If a vision of your partner cheating with someone else were to enter your mind, then rage and jealousy emerge.
Another classic trap is assigning enduring personal meaning to events in our lives. Failing to get a job can trigger thoughts of worthlessness and hopelessness, even though there are many reasons for not getting a job that have nothing to do with personal qualities. It’s one thing to be responsive to feedback but quite another to begin thinking and believing as if every negative event is caused by some personal shortcoming.
Wake-Up Call
Destructive daydreaming — becoming trapped in a memory of a memory of a memory, dwelling on past injustices or fearing future failures, or building terrible stories about actual events that may or may not have any basis in reality — creates intense suffering for many of us. Escape from these nightmares is among the strongest reasons to develop your own mindfulness. As I’ve written elsewhere, mindfulness does not require a great deal of time or space. (See Three Steps to Everyday Mindfulness.) In fact, it can be as simple as asking yourself several times a day: am I “awake,” that is, am I paying attention to this present moment and the task before me? Or are my feelings and thoughts elsewhere? Just asking the question on a regular basis may provide the “jolt” you need to move another step towards awareness.
