Trying so hard

[kelsischanging]

I have been trying so hard. I want to be sober. In the United States to go to AA you have to have the "desire" to stop drinking. I HAVE that desire. I have not been able to get through a night with out alcohol yet but I have been attending AA meetings. In the past I would have never gone because I just thought I was "heavy drinker" not an alcoholic. I have learned a lot from these meetings and part of me is ready to take the next step of giving up alcohol and part of me just doesn't think life is worth living with out it. I have heard the most amazing stories of recovery in the AA meetings. I leave thinking "I CAN do this...but the next day...I don't think I can". I feel like I am 50% there.

 

[forgetmenot]

You made the first important step in reaching out for support way to go that took a lot of strength It is good to hear you are going to the meetings 50 percent is more then where you were at so give it time ok you will continue to heal with the support you have reached out to . way to go hun

 

[kelsischanging]

I really can't believe I took that step but I'm so glad I did. The first meeting, I will admit I did not go to sober but it was so empowering....now they are something I look forward to...I know they will help me get clean...the testimonies of the alcoholics there are amazing...but at times...mostly times when I am drinking I think..."can I do this?"..."do I want to do this"...

 

[gooblax]

I'm really proud of you for taking that step. It's great to hear that you look forward to the meetings