Laurie said:
Laurie, it’s nice to “meet” you too. Thank you for your reply – that in itself has been a great reassurance to me. Anyone who can reach out in the way that everyone has in this thread – and especially you – from such a distance is really someone special to me. I find that I need a lot of reassurance to make me feel somewhat better about myself. I wish I could find it easier to accept compliments and believe what people say about me as I don’t think the same way.
Laurie said:
Feel free to ask me questions – I’m not sure if I’ll be able to answer all of them but I will try my best. I believe that when people ask questions it would help me to form some sort of “knowledge base” to aid me in talking more; reason being is that I don’t know how to string words properly together into a complex question, and also it would encourage me to think about what I really want to achieve.
Laurie said:
I was not insulted or offended, but thank you for thinking about my feelings in advance.
Laurie said:
Yes, I do feel like that - more often than not, and I don't like it at all.
Laurie said:
For me, I thought that cutting would let out what was vile within and for someone who doesn’t like pain, I can’t understand why I ever did such a thing. When I first started, I did not know what effect it would have, but I soon realized that it calmed me down like nothing else. Maybe I had a daring streak to my personality and did not care about myself – I only wanted to hurt myself so much. I did not think about the consequences of my actions and now regret it very much.
Laurie said:
I also find it hard to trust people. I find it easier to talk to someone I don’t know as they wouldn’t be able to form an impression and judge me on their previous knowledge about me.
Laurie said:
Yes, that might be good for me – if only I can learn how to talk again. It seems like I’m two or three different people. When I’m outside I’m afraid of what people may think of me – mainly because they do not see the true me; but then again, I do not know what the “true me” might be as I have never felt comfortable with myself.
I know I have the brains to talk as I often found that I was speaking in my mind what I wanted to say but another part of my brain was not triggering the right receptors to produce the response – i.e. a voice using words to communicate! Therefore, I’m going to train that part of the brain to not let me “close up” when I need to talk. I’m not sure how I’ll do this, but I believe I’m getting more talkative already! If I believe it will work, then it will work! Believing is the key – I just have to unlock the potential. I have no idea about my theories but I’ll try it out.
I just want to get that bottle I’ve been filling up and smash it to pieces and start again! Create a new identity for myself; one where I can feel secure and at ease with myself. I think that’s the main part of what’s eating me – my personality – I don’t want to be alone anymore, I don’t want to feel persecuted, I don’t want to be demoralised – all this because of something wrong with my personality.
Laurie said:
In a nutshell, I would like to help someone give a smile. Giving developing countries a chance to experience the richer life we have. Helping someone find peace of mind. Finding a way for people to lead better lives. I just don’t know how to aid people when I can’t seem to discover a way to help myself. When I can help someone I have a great sense of fulfilment.
Laurie said:
What am I doing? Sometimes I don’t realize what I’m doing is good.
Laurie said:
I would like to be able to improve my compositions and write a book. I want to feel like I truly exist in this world, and doing those things will help me know that. I would like a secure job that interests me – but there are so many things I want to do that perhaps is not humanly possible. Maybe I want too much or have too many immaterial ambitions but it matters to me and somehow I don’t think this will ever be achieved. I want a world free of wars for generations upon generations. I would like everyone to lead a satisfied and happy life because when I look deeper I know that this world is actually a good place to inhabit – nature is beautiful, but do animals feel suicidal? I know I do think quite stupidly sometimes.
Whenever I run from the pain it always catches up with me and seeks to destroy my being. If I build a wall, like I have been doing, I can block the pain out, but if I keep on building walls, I end up trapped with nowhere to go and will be tormented in what I have created for myself. Is there another way I can be rid of this? If I faced the pain, be wise to its deceptions, I can find a way to liberate myself – but it takes careful planning, time and endurance to lead a fulfilled life. And so I’m still waiting.
Again, sorry I wrote so much and I hope I made sense. I find it difficult to express myself, and writing does not come easy for me, no matter what you may think of my writing.
Hello! 
Also, I know why you cut yourself. I've done the same.
It was a desperate cry for help. People do this when they feel extremely suicidal; and feel no other way out. Another way you can do this without hurting yourself (that is, making you feel calmer) is exterise for only 5 minutes. Some people cut themselfs repeatly because they KNOW that once they do it, it will make them feel calmer and better. It's a bad habit to get into. They get hooked on it.
I still have scars from cutting myself. I wish I would've never done it..
Also, I know why you cut yourself. I've done the same.
It was a desperate cry for help. People do this when they feel extremely suicidal; and feel no other way out. Another way you can do this without hurting yourself (that is, making you feel calmer) is exterise for only 5 minutes. Some people cut themselfs repeatly because they KNOW that once they do it, it will make them feel calmer and better. It's a bad habit to get into. They get hooked on it.
I still have scars from cutting myself. I wish I would've never done it..
Hello!
Nice to hear from you Enigma. The strange thing is..I'm 16 too and feel just like you!
I try to be nice to people; but have felt like they don't care. I'm suicidal too.. I've cut myself..and done all that.
I was really surprised when you said you're only 16. You write very well, and have an amazing vocabulary. I think it's GREAT you're not into drugs and doing WELL in school. Most depressed people have very bad marks in school.
I don't do drugs either, and I do very well in school. If you see my most recent post, you'll see I'm dealing with a ton of problems too. Mainly, I'm so persistant in some things to a point of obession, hurt, and anger. I drive myself insane for good marks.
I've gotten Scholastic Achivement awards for the best improvements in my high school, my name and picture in the arizona newspaper, 50$ and a free breakfast. I've also gotten a card from the University of arizona inviting me to go there.
This is a good thing; but its not. Because I'm so obessed with it, it drives me insane.
For you, you excel in language. For me, its mathmatics. I'm only take geometry in high school (the highest they teach), but I'm learning advanced calculus and physics (Even though I don't have any real tests for it!)
Here are some helpful tips I hope you please follow. I have depression too, so its easier for me to help you:
1) Please realize that there ARE people that care for you, and love you. Your parents love you..even if you don't think so. People here love you and care for you. That is the major thing of people with depression, they think everyone hates them and blame everything on themselfs. This is not the case! I am very nice in real life too, just like you. I try to help people, but I only dread on the negative when alot of people do like me, and they like you too!
2) Please excerise when your feeling angry; depressed, etc. This helps alot. When you excerise, sterotonin in your brain rises (also called dopamine; it's the "feel good" chemical that calms you when you take drugs, but it happens naturally when you excerise) which will give you energy as well.
3) Come here if your feeling low. When someone else says something good about you; it interacts the "bad" things people say about you, and you'll feel happier and better about yourself.
4) Listen to motivational music. It helps; and makes you feel not so lonely and that other people have problems too. You're not alone.
Best wishes,
~Kevin.
Enigma said:
Nice to hear from you Enigma. The strange thing is..I'm 16 too and feel just like you!
I try to be nice to people; but have felt like they don't care. I'm suicidal too.. I've cut myself..and done all that.
I was really surprised when you said you're only 16. You write very well, and have an amazing vocabulary. I think it's GREAT you're not into drugs and doing WELL in school. Most depressed people have very bad marks in school.
I don't do drugs either, and I do very well in school. If you see my most recent post, you'll see I'm dealing with a ton of problems too. Mainly, I'm so persistant in some things to a point of obession, hurt, and anger. I drive myself insane for good marks.
I've gotten Scholastic Achivement awards for the best improvements in my high school, my name and picture in the arizona newspaper, 50$ and a free breakfast. I've also gotten a card from the University of arizona inviting me to go there.
This is a good thing; but its not. Because I'm so obessed with it, it drives me insane.
For you, you excel in language. For me, its mathmatics. I'm only take geometry in high school (the highest they teach), but I'm learning advanced calculus and physics (Even though I don't have any real tests for it!)
Here are some helpful tips I hope you please follow. I have depression too, so its easier for me to help you:
1) Please realize that there ARE people that care for you, and love you. Your parents love you..even if you don't think so. People here love you and care for you. That is the major thing of people with depression, they think everyone hates them and blame everything on themselfs. This is not the case! I am very nice in real life too, just like you. I try to help people, but I only dread on the negative when alot of people do like me, and they like you too!
2) Please excerise when your feeling angry; depressed, etc. This helps alot. When you excerise, sterotonin in your brain rises (also called dopamine; it's the "feel good" chemical that calms you when you take drugs, but it happens naturally when you excerise) which will give you energy as well.
3) Come here if your feeling low. When someone else says something good about you; it interacts the "bad" things people say about you, and you'll feel happier and better about yourself.
4) Listen to motivational music. It helps; and makes you feel not so lonely and that other people have problems too. You're not alone.
Best wishes,
~Kevin.
Laurie
Member
Hi Enigma! It's good to hear from you
I am like this too. When I'm trying new things or learning new things or struggling with things I need lots of reassurance to give me the confidence to keep going. It's really hard when I don't get it. It's kind of funny, I find myself reassuring everyone around me when that is what I need. If anyone ever really pays attention, they will read me very easily just by watching this in me. I, consequently, always try to catch myself and stop <G>I also have a really hard time with compliments. I wonder why we are like that. Why is it ok to compliment others (and if you're like me, this makes you feel really good about yourself) but not ok to accept them from others? What do you think of yourself? I think this is a really hard question and I could not tell you much about myself in this way. If/when I figure it out, I'll share it with you. I'll bet you're much better at this than I am though. What do you think?
I'm glad you think this way. I am like that too. That's also why I read discussions on this forum. It helps me open up my mind to things I have not thought of, cause what I have thought of certainly isn't enough. It's interesting that you say it would encourage you to think about what you want. I hadn't thought of it that way. I'm always trying to figure out the things that happened in my past. I have great difficulty trying to decide what I really want. I think I don't know how to want something. Strange huh? It is to me. Sounds really weird to be saying it too.
I hate it. Someone in another post said she felt like a 'spectator'. I thought that was a good way to put it. Like everyone around you is living and you really aren't - you just watch them. I just want to find my niche and feel like I'm in the right place and I belong there and there is balance in my life. I just don't know what that looks like so it's hard for me to reach for it. Make sense?
I cannot imagine what you must be going through as I have never done this. Hmm...do you remember what went through your mind the first time? I was thinking that that must have been the hardest and I'm wondering what made you cross the line and actually do it. I also wonder if the physical pain (in addition to the symbolism of letting out what is vile) isn't a distraction and easier than the emotional pain. When pain was too much for me, I used to allow men to degrade me - it got me attention but not the kind I was desperate for, but it also made me hit rock bottom and when you do that, you can only come up and that was the only way I knew to get myself in the upward swing. Terrible, terrible consequences I am facing now because of those choices. Now, I watch serial killer movies. I am so fascinated by the criminal mind and it is so dark and heavy and intriquing that it helps me forget or put in place whatever is upsetting me. For some strange reason, I also feel stronger afterwards. I also think it's an outlet for my anger. I bottle everything, and when I get really really mad, I just watch some of my movies and I'm not mad anymore. Can you see that I'm really not dealing with it at all? That's another reason I read this forum. I need to grow up and really face all this stuff.
Exactly. And, I don't worry about running into someone I talk to on here when I'm not ready to talk about something or face it right then. And it's not scheduled. I can come and talk when I can/want and I'm in control. I really love this because it makes me 100% accountable for my choice to try to get better and I don't have to give anyone else credit for that. It's not muddied up with having to keep an appointment or feel obligated. I think the more we make good choices, the easier it gets. And the better we feel about ourselves, the easier it will be to feel comfortable facing someone in person without all the hangups. What do you think?
Yep. I understand this one too. My Mom was always asking me what I was thinking etc... and I used to get so frustrated and feel so dumb because I could not answer her. She would push harder and harder and I just couldn't think of a word. It was more like a picture in my mind and I could not think of words to describe the picture.
I believe you are exactly right. And what a positive and brave attitude! It really encourages me to read these words. Thanks!
When you think of creating a new identity, what are the ingredients/characteristics you think of? I'm going to think of this too. It's a good way to find out how to reach my goals. In other words, if security is an ingredient in the 'new you' how did you get it? Was it just always there? Were you raised differently and that was the result? Or do you just react differently? or.....
Do you think something is wrong with your personality or did someone tell you this? What do you think is wrong?
You are putting a lot of effort into becoming the person you want to be. I'm sure it's not always easy to come talk here. I know for me it isn't. But you keep working at finding out how to feel better, be better. That's very positive -don't you think so?
I think it would be wonderful if you wrote a book! Any idea what you would write about?
I'm interested in many things too. I want to work in a million different businesses just to learn how they work. I do wonder about myself here though cause I will never be really good at one thing if I keep this up. But I'm efficient at many, so it's not all bad. I need to be challenged constantly to be happy. That's a hard thing to be. But I also wish I could just settle down with one or two things and really excel at them and be an expert. I just haven't found what that is.
Ooh, you are so right here. I have been cementing the walls for years and it is so hard to try to dissolve them. I shake while I'm typing on here sometimes. And you're also right, we create these things for ourselves. That's why I think it's so good that we keep talking and reading here. I think it's very helpful and healing. I hope we both find the way out of this.
I'm glad you wrote what you did. I want to hear what you have to say and you made perfect sense to me and I look forward to hearing from you again.
^^Phoenix^^
Member
Hi Enigma,
Just wanted to say School offered theorapy is sometimes judged a little too harshly. I went to see mine, all through high school, they wont just take your problems with a pinch of salt, and if they do not think that they can help you, they will get you the help you need.
ttyl
Robs
Just wanted to say School offered theorapy is sometimes judged a little too harshly. I went to see mine, all through high school, they wont just take your problems with a pinch of salt, and if they do not think that they can help you, they will get you the help you need.
ttyl
Robs
Brilliant and Loving Life
Member
High Achievement
Hi Enigma and Kevin reading your posts reminded me of how I felt at your age. I did some research online regarding my own obsessive high achievement behaviour and I came across a magnificent helpful quote.
Explained with a story of how bronze medal winners are happier than silver medal winners because of their attitude towards achievement.
"Manage your expectations of success for maximum happiness."
(check out www.thehappyguy.com, many relevant topics discussed here)
In the past I pursued achievements, eventually mastering a large online team game to become a world champion after several years of constant play.
When I achieved that goal I felt dissastisfied, anxious and confused.
I'd climbed the mountain and there was no new view.
It had been my goal, I'd struggled with all of my strength to achieve it, working an average of 20 hours a day for years.
Once I was successful I had to maintain it. That was the difficulty that caused me anxiety at the time. Fear of losing, fear of regressing from my peak of performance.
I felt that my success was unrewarded because my aspiriation was not only considered frivalous but a failure because of the price I payed with the rest of my life. Prior to success I percieved it as being an interesting and justifable personal challenge that gave me value.
Nobody really cared that I had done it except for my peers on the game. I didn't care about those people and so it meant nothing to me.
Even when I was famous and constantly in the spotlight to 130,000 people online and someone had formed a fanclub devoted to me.
If my family, friends were proud of it that perhaps would have been different but it was as if I had done something wrong not something right.
Now in the light of hindsight I wish I had pursued the things that would have been relevant to those who were important in my life and also sensible to the course of my life as a whole entity. That is finding the correct and relevant aspects of life that would be of future importance to me before I focused my direction on an achievement.
Being egocentric I believed that if it mattered to me, that was enough.
How wrong I was on that point.
David has mentioned some things about time management.
I agree with putting an empthasis on the consideration of how much time is one subject or task worth and I'd also suggest considering the implications of your actions as they will be viewed by the wider community, particularly your immediate family and close friends.
Academic success will not be as harmful to your life as my choices were to mine however remember not to exclude others from your journey as when the journey ends, what is remaining?
A more prominent question is who is remaining?
Time invested in friendship early in life, particularly in highschool can be invaluable. I regret many things, but mostly I regret the loss of people from my life.
To ever escape from pursuing achievement as a sole centralisation of your personal power you are going to need supportive friends and an understanding of their importance in your life.
I wish you great success.
You're both highly talented young men with great journeys ahead of you.
Hi Enigma and Kevin reading your posts reminded me of how I felt at your age. I did some research online regarding my own obsessive high achievement behaviour and I came across a magnificent helpful quote.
Explained with a story of how bronze medal winners are happier than silver medal winners because of their attitude towards achievement.
"Manage your expectations of success for maximum happiness."
(check out www.thehappyguy.com, many relevant topics discussed here)
In the past I pursued achievements, eventually mastering a large online team game to become a world champion after several years of constant play.
When I achieved that goal I felt dissastisfied, anxious and confused.
I'd climbed the mountain and there was no new view.
It had been my goal, I'd struggled with all of my strength to achieve it, working an average of 20 hours a day for years.
Once I was successful I had to maintain it. That was the difficulty that caused me anxiety at the time. Fear of losing, fear of regressing from my peak of performance.
I felt that my success was unrewarded because my aspiriation was not only considered frivalous but a failure because of the price I payed with the rest of my life. Prior to success I percieved it as being an interesting and justifable personal challenge that gave me value.
Nobody really cared that I had done it except for my peers on the game. I didn't care about those people and so it meant nothing to me.
Even when I was famous and constantly in the spotlight to 130,000 people online and someone had formed a fanclub devoted to me.
If my family, friends were proud of it that perhaps would have been different but it was as if I had done something wrong not something right.
Now in the light of hindsight I wish I had pursued the things that would have been relevant to those who were important in my life and also sensible to the course of my life as a whole entity. That is finding the correct and relevant aspects of life that would be of future importance to me before I focused my direction on an achievement.
Being egocentric I believed that if it mattered to me, that was enough.
How wrong I was on that point.
David has mentioned some things about time management.
I agree with putting an empthasis on the consideration of how much time is one subject or task worth and I'd also suggest considering the implications of your actions as they will be viewed by the wider community, particularly your immediate family and close friends.
Academic success will not be as harmful to your life as my choices were to mine however remember not to exclude others from your journey as when the journey ends, what is remaining?
A more prominent question is who is remaining?
Time invested in friendship early in life, particularly in highschool can be invaluable. I regret many things, but mostly I regret the loss of people from my life.
To ever escape from pursuing achievement as a sole centralisation of your personal power you are going to need supportive friends and an understanding of their importance in your life.
I wish you great success.
You're both highly talented young men with great journeys ahead of you.
Thank you everyone for your encouraging posts.
I've been in a bad way, so I haven't been able to post much. I feel extremely selfish for coming back here, when I didn't help anyone.
I stopped seeing the school counsellor as it didn't work for me. I've got nowhere to go and because Christmas is looming, I'm going to have to keep it bottled up for a while longer as I don't want to spoil it for everyone.
With thanks,
- Enigma
I've been in a bad way, so I haven't been able to post much. I feel extremely selfish for coming back here, when I didn't help anyone.
I stopped seeing the school counsellor as it didn't work for me. I've got nowhere to go and because Christmas is looming, I'm going to have to keep it bottled up for a while longer as I don't want to spoil it for everyone.
With thanks,
- Enigma
ThatLady
Member
Enigma, by bringing your feelings here, you are not spoiling anything for anyone. Talking about those feelings, particularly if they are causing you to feel depressed, is much better than bottling them up. To tell you the truth, it would spoil things much more (at least, for me) to think that you were keeping those feeling inside yourself and suffering for doing so. I think that's true for the others here, as well.
Laurie
Member
I don’t think you are selfish for talking on the forum and not ‘helping’. I wish you could see that what you say helps others who cannot verbalize similar feelings. That is very helpful and valuable. Please don’t stop talking on here. I am sure I am not the only one who feels like this.
And I would love to hear your thoughts about Christmas. I have not had a Christmas since high school and I’m 41 years old. I am on a quest to find out what people’s traditions are so I can develop my own. I want to know what they do on Christmas Eve, for Christmas dinner, whether they exchange gifts or not and why and what they do on Christmas day. I don’t know what is troubling you about it, but I would love to hear. I know several people who have stopped celebrating it as they don’t receive any pleasure from it. What is bothering you? If you want to share it. J
And I would love to hear your thoughts about Christmas. I have not had a Christmas since high school and I’m 41 years old. I am on a quest to find out what people’s traditions are so I can develop my own. I want to know what they do on Christmas Eve, for Christmas dinner, whether they exchange gifts or not and why and what they do on Christmas day. I don’t know what is troubling you about it, but I would love to hear. I know several people who have stopped celebrating it as they don’t receive any pleasure from it. What is bothering you? If you want to share it. J
Thank you ThatLady and Laurie.
I feel that Christmas should be a happy time. Well, it was alright - didn't feel like Christmas, but perhaps it's a sign of me getting old too quick!
There are so many things I want to do, so many things I want to achieve, but I don't know where to start. Any suggestions? I find it difficult to take things one step at a time.
- Enigma
I feel that Christmas should be a happy time. Well, it was alright - didn't feel like Christmas, but perhaps it's a sign of me getting old too quick!
There are so many things I want to do, so many things I want to achieve, but I don't know where to start. Any suggestions? I find it difficult to take things one step at a time.
- Enigma
ThatLady
Member
Taking things one step at a time, for most of us, is a skill that is learned. By piling too much on your plate at once, you almost doom yourself to failure. If nothing else, enough failures and you learn not to do dat no more. ;o)
Start with something small and short-term. If, for instance, a person finds that they tend to let things go around the house until they're having to blaze a trail to get to the bathroom, taking steps to remedy that issue is a good place for that person to start...especially, that area between where you spend most of your time and the bathroom. :cackle:
Pick something that's bothering you and make a step-by-step plan of how to remedy the problem. Start slowly and keep working on it. Don't beat yourself up if you slip, just pick it up the next day and keep moving forward. When you get that task done, pick another task and approach it the same way. You'd be surprised how quickly you'll see improvement in your day-to-day life, and your satisfaction with yourself and your accomplishments.
Start with something small and short-term. If, for instance, a person finds that they tend to let things go around the house until they're having to blaze a trail to get to the bathroom, taking steps to remedy that issue is a good place for that person to start...especially, that area between where you spend most of your time and the bathroom. :cackle:
Pick something that's bothering you and make a step-by-step plan of how to remedy the problem. Start slowly and keep working on it. Don't beat yourself up if you slip, just pick it up the next day and keep moving forward. When you get that task done, pick another task and approach it the same way. You'd be surprised how quickly you'll see improvement in your day-to-day life, and your satisfaction with yourself and your accomplishments.
Enigma,
I was very like you at 16. I didn't want to talk to my parents either. The funny thing was that years later when I did make the effort to talk to my parents I found it to be a big help to me and surprisingly to them also.
If you can see a therapist first, that would probably be helpful to you. I can remember how I felt. I was very athletic, but was an outcast by the "Jocks" because I was friends with those who needed friends most. I was friends with those the popular kids made fun of, so naturally I fell into that. I left high school early and completed my GED through a community college where students have mostly grown out of that high school attitude. It really helped me. I don't know if they have something like that there but it wouldn't hurt to look into it. And always do your best. When you get marks against you, take a look at what you got wrong and then focus on those issues on the next paper. Take it as positive criticism and then use it to your advantage.
Also, never give up. Others here have made mention of your writing skills. You seem like a smart kid. I was & really struggled in school for many reasons. I kept a journal then & later burned it when reading it only depressed me. But even that was therapeutic to me. It helped me to burn away the painful past and get on with the present and future.
I am not a doctor or anything, just another person who has been there. I now work in the high tech industry, run my own aquarium fish business and work with troubled youth on a volunteer basis in my area. Remember that no matter how bad you feel things are, you are strong enough to get past it and make a difference in this world. If you feel that those here or someone else is able to help you, return the favor by helping another - that is where the real help comes into play.
<edit by Admin>
I was very like you at 16. I didn't want to talk to my parents either. The funny thing was that years later when I did make the effort to talk to my parents I found it to be a big help to me and surprisingly to them also.
If you can see a therapist first, that would probably be helpful to you. I can remember how I felt. I was very athletic, but was an outcast by the "Jocks" because I was friends with those who needed friends most. I was friends with those the popular kids made fun of, so naturally I fell into that. I left high school early and completed my GED through a community college where students have mostly grown out of that high school attitude. It really helped me. I don't know if they have something like that there but it wouldn't hurt to look into it. And always do your best. When you get marks against you, take a look at what you got wrong and then focus on those issues on the next paper. Take it as positive criticism and then use it to your advantage.
Also, never give up. Others here have made mention of your writing skills. You seem like a smart kid. I was & really struggled in school for many reasons. I kept a journal then & later burned it when reading it only depressed me. But even that was therapeutic to me. It helped me to burn away the painful past and get on with the present and future.
I am not a doctor or anything, just another person who has been there. I now work in the high tech industry, run my own aquarium fish business and work with troubled youth on a volunteer basis in my area. Remember that no matter how bad you feel things are, you are strong enough to get past it and make a difference in this world. If you feel that those here or someone else is able to help you, return the favor by helping another - that is where the real help comes into play.
<edit by Admin>
Thank you ThatLady, I will try to do what you suggested, but at the moment I haven't got much motivation.
Thank you also, Jon, for your understanding.
This place is so great and very supportive, I wish I could come here more often. It's the one place where I can feel comfortable, even though I haven't helped anyone, and you know how I feel about that.
Thank you also, Jon, for your understanding.
This place is so great and very supportive, I wish I could come here more often. It's the one place where I can feel comfortable, even though I haven't helped anyone, and you know how I feel about that.
ThatLady
Member
What makes you think you haven't helped anyone, Enigma? It's my bet that you have. By posting your feelings in such eloquent terms you let others, who may feel much the same, know they are not alone, just as you are not alone. We're all on this planet together, and just by being together we can help each other through the hard parts.
Hey enigma.
A couple years ago i was in a similar situation.
I think the first step is to go to therapy. At first, i was very nervous about going to therapy. My parents noticed my tired and fatigued physical condition and thought i might be having problems at school, so they encouraged me to see a therapist (I had told my parents nothing of my condition). I eventually went and after the first meeting i didn't feel so nervous about it. It has really helped me out.
I'd also suggest working out or playing some kind of sport. I used to come home after school and play tennis everyday. It took my mind off the problems in life and i kinda escaped reality for those 2 hours i played everyday. It also helped me sleep ALOT better.
A couple years ago i was in a similar situation.
I think the first step is to go to therapy. At first, i was very nervous about going to therapy. My parents noticed my tired and fatigued physical condition and thought i might be having problems at school, so they encouraged me to see a therapist (I had told my parents nothing of my condition). I eventually went and after the first meeting i didn't feel so nervous about it. It has really helped me out.
I'd also suggest working out or playing some kind of sport. I used to come home after school and play tennis everyday. It took my mind off the problems in life and i kinda escaped reality for those 2 hours i played everyday. It also helped me sleep ALOT better.
Well, I don’t think I haven’t helped anyone directly then. Whenever I post about myself I feel bad as it seems like I’m attention seeking. Thank you for you kind words, ThatLady.
My parents haven’t really noticed anything wrong with me, but I know I’m not coping with school. I’ve just been predicted a B for maths – so my work is slipping. I think going into therapy would help me a lot because the counsellors I’ve seen haven’t helped me much. I need to find a way of talking to my parents without hurting them – I’m afraid to see their reaction and whether or not they will be able to cope with me in this state.
Sport does help me, but it’s sad that I haven’t found much time for it recently. Thanks, crr890.
I do try to write down how I feel in the form of poetry or prose. I stopped keeping a diary as I found I just didn't have the time to write every night.
My parents haven’t really noticed anything wrong with me, but I know I’m not coping with school. I’ve just been predicted a B for maths – so my work is slipping. I think going into therapy would help me a lot because the counsellors I’ve seen haven’t helped me much. I need to find a way of talking to my parents without hurting them – I’m afraid to see their reaction and whether or not they will be able to cope with me in this state.
Sport does help me, but it’s sad that I haven’t found much time for it recently. Thanks, crr890.
I do try to write down how I feel in the form of poetry or prose. I stopped keeping a diary as I found I just didn't have the time to write every night.
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