More threads by lammers1980

I seem to have a problem that repeats itself whenever I get acquainted with a new friend. I find when I start hanging out with somebody new (fellow male friend) I tend to have a good time, not really worrying too much. However, after I have left my friend's house or got off the phone, I can't help but go over every detail of the visit/conversation in my mind. I am worried that I might have said/did something that would either offend my friend or not want to hang out anymore. Worries usually include being rude/annoying/freeloading, such as taking more than giving, etc. Sometimes, I find these worries are troublesome and I think that others may feel I am strange that I would be so preoccupied with this, but I can't seem to stop myself. Would this be an OCD thing, or something else? Has anyone else gone through this? I used to get the same thing when I was dating, and even with my wife, when we first started seeing each other. I find it also wears off after I've been friends for a while.

David Baxter PhD

Late Founder
It is "an OCD thing", Steve.

It's part of you. It's how you worry. Most people will momentarily review and question social interactions, especially when they don't know the other person well -- that's a normal thing and a positive thing -- it reflects your empathy and concern for other people. When you are someone with obsessive-compulsive tendencies or traits, the way you worry is more intense and more self-critical but basically it is still just worrying.
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