Hi,
I?ve been posting here two weks ago seeking some advice on the social issues/anxiety/panic attacks of my boyfriend. I did get some helpful advice but it seems it was all too much for the relationship.
We had been going out for one year, he is 32 and it ws only his second relationship. I always had the feeling that I couldn?t relax as I fell for him head over heels and he seemed much cooler and often somehow distant and not very good with words. He has been suffering from anxiety attacks for two years and had been waiting for a therapist for a year. Recently he had been really busy with work etc. and didn?t seem to want to spend much time with me, asked, he would say he would like things to cool down as discussions never seemed to go anywhere. It came to the point where I felt I had to get out of it as it started affecting my self-esteem and I thought I wasnt beautiful/sexy/ feminine enough and after a weekend where I was quite sick and he didn?t call me once I told him he should pick up his stuff. He didn`t even do me this favour.
I told him I loved him but would let him go so he could find himself and get happy. He emailed me saying he felt selfish for having to explore his inner feelings and hated himself for treating me the way he did, he didn?t deserve me.
We met up a week later and he said he missed me, couldn`t wait to see me. He wasn?t sure about anything and maybe in the future we could be together.
I asked him to leave me alone as I needed time to heal and couldn?t move on otherwise. He understood, we hugged and cried, he told me he loved me(for the first time) but maybe not enoguh. He keeps sending me very affectionate texts which confuse me so much!
I?m just trying to make sense of it all, did I do too much, did he just need me for a bit, is it really all over, is he maybe not capable of the commitment.
I?d be really glad to get some advice as I?m so sad and miss him so much. At the same time I know that seeing him as a friend would break my heart even more as I would always be longing for him.
Your views would be very much appreciated, thanks.
I?ve been posting here two weks ago seeking some advice on the social issues/anxiety/panic attacks of my boyfriend. I did get some helpful advice but it seems it was all too much for the relationship.
We had been going out for one year, he is 32 and it ws only his second relationship. I always had the feeling that I couldn?t relax as I fell for him head over heels and he seemed much cooler and often somehow distant and not very good with words. He has been suffering from anxiety attacks for two years and had been waiting for a therapist for a year. Recently he had been really busy with work etc. and didn?t seem to want to spend much time with me, asked, he would say he would like things to cool down as discussions never seemed to go anywhere. It came to the point where I felt I had to get out of it as it started affecting my self-esteem and I thought I wasnt beautiful/sexy/ feminine enough and after a weekend where I was quite sick and he didn?t call me once I told him he should pick up his stuff. He didn`t even do me this favour.
I told him I loved him but would let him go so he could find himself and get happy. He emailed me saying he felt selfish for having to explore his inner feelings and hated himself for treating me the way he did, he didn?t deserve me.
We met up a week later and he said he missed me, couldn`t wait to see me. He wasn?t sure about anything and maybe in the future we could be together.
I asked him to leave me alone as I needed time to heal and couldn?t move on otherwise. He understood, we hugged and cried, he told me he loved me(for the first time) but maybe not enoguh. He keeps sending me very affectionate texts which confuse me so much!
I?m just trying to make sense of it all, did I do too much, did he just need me for a bit, is it really all over, is he maybe not capable of the commitment.
I?d be really glad to get some advice as I?m so sad and miss him so much. At the same time I know that seeing him as a friend would break my heart even more as I would always be longing for him.
Your views would be very much appreciated, thanks.