Chronic Suicidality ... Playing the long game ...

[rdw]

Group therapy is about talking and sharing with the members. What did the mental health team say? Did they offer you any solutions or alternative options?

 

[A Nonny Mouse]

We tried to be a part of the group we really did, but would take so long to build up enough composure to speak, someone else would beoff on a tangent or the topic would be closed and moved on. Last session we attended was in short a barrage from another member on how selfish we were five mins before end of session and we left in floods of tears as time had ended and session closed ... No nothing else has been offered. Even though we went down last week and said we needed support ... They are setting up a meeting in three weeks to set a date and sort out another meeting to do with the kids ... They know we live in a shed, our housing status on our mental health profile states rough sleeper so they know as they changed it ... But still nothing changes ...

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Thank you x

 

[Harebells]

Sorry that happened in your group therapy, it sounds awful.I find it so hard to physically speak in group situations too, I understand. So horrible that the other member attacked you at the end and you were just left with that, doesn't sound very therapeutic!! how are you now? hope the meeting goes well (((hugs)))

 

[A Nonny Mouse]

Meeting was supposed to be last week, no-one bothered to sort it so never had it. Guess it just proves what a waste of space we are.

{deleted triggering passage}

 

[Jesse910]

Nonny: I wish there was a way for you to receive tangible assistance that would assist you towards healing. While I have never had group therapy, I can only imagine your frustration. I don't know whether you've already asked whether or not it is possible to receive an individual appointment. What about other sources for counseling?

 

[A Nonny Mouse]

The system in the uk is any counscelling is currently only 8 weeks of sessions allowed ... Which really doesn't make much progress when you have to wait 4 months each time for a block of 8 ... Of course there's private, but cost is a factor as well as finding someone 'suitable' ... Its all just ... If we had a magic wand, we would like the diagnosis all sorted properly so that at least the medications would be useful, and not be shoehorned into a single diagnosis therapy which works against other diagnosis ...

 

[Jesse910]

Nonny: This definitely makes finding/bonding with a therapist very tough. Our system in the U.S. has its peaks and valleys in terms of patient care. However, even with a wait time, cost constraints, and finding the right person, help is available. Question: Do you have a personal physician who might be able to recommend someone to you for a nonimal fee?

 

[A Nonny Mouse]

No, its just all a waste of resources .... Well we finally managed to push it so far we eneded up physically ill and admitted to hospital blah blah blah and guess what, mental health teams still don't want to know, guess you have to acually die to get anywhere ....

 

[Jesse910]

Hi Nonny:

I know the hospital is not where you want to be. However, while you indicate that the mental health team does not know you are there, perhaps someone will finally listen to your situation. When I am stretched as far as I can go, I have to believe that help is nearby. I wish that for you now and always.

 

[A Nonny Mouse]

Was in for 8 days and 3 operations to sort the damage we did, mental health don't want to know. We requested them several times and even phoned ourselves. Nothing more we can do but accept we are just not worth it.

 

[Jesse910]

There is more going on here.

 

[A Nonny Mouse]

More going on ? Sorry not following what you mean ? Do you think we are lying ? Have an agenda ? Nope ... Just a place to vent, let out thoughts etc ... Apologies if you think bad of us for some reason, not the intension.

 

[Jesse910]

Nonny:

I do not think that you are lying. My observational comment is in reference to the people who were caring for you in the hospital. I'm puzzled why they were not listening to you.

 

[A Nonny Mouse]

Thank you for claifying x part of our group work is to ask rather than assume what someone means ... But yes ... Psychatrist, gp, etc etc all know what we do, but still we never have any contact with anyone or support ... Except group therapy in which we find too much and sit in silence for an hour and a half ...

 

[Jesse910]

Nonny:

I recall your inability to speak up in group. I'm wondering what would happen if you allowed yourself the freedom to say a bit about yourself. Sometimes doors open when we take a risk.

 

[A Nonny Mouse]

We've been made to speak a few times where our rudeness has been challenged or we've been pulled into something, usually its too intense whatever the emotion is and we just end up shaking and crying .... And then have to run out to survive ...

 

[Jesse910]

Nonny:

I get the weirdness of feeling vulnerable. I do not know anyone who takes comfort in that experience. Yet, in those rare moments when I have allowed myself to be known, while I have literally thought that I was falling apart, I have been met with understanding, comfort, and relief. Healing is not easy. It breaks us apart and leaves us feeling exposed to the core. The end result is that we gain a piece of ourselves in the process.

 

[A Nonny Mouse]

Still around, still playing the 'long game'. Interesting to read the old posts ... Not much change ... More surgeries and hospital admissions and drips and anti b's for trying to die ... Currently in the same state ... Its even all writtem in our mental health care plan that we do this and everything, phoned cpn last week for urgent help under our crisis plan, had to wait 8 days for appointment and had 7 mins to be told nothing they will do, might see you in a month or so ...


This constant ... People are not believing that this is not us not engaging services but are the srrvice that's so poor and yet we are blamed thereby retraumatising and pushing us lower and furhter into harm.

 

[Jesse910]

Key phrase here: "Still around, playing the long game." When you're ready to work on living, let us know.

 

[A Nonny Mouse]

Wow welcoming, that's for re triggering ...