Daughter shows signs of OCD

[cleanfreak]

i need to know what i can do to help my daughter not to fall into the pit.
i have ocd, and now it looks as though my daughter is showing tendencies as well (of course there's only one to blame!!!).
mostly it shows in the morning while getting ready - it's taking longer and longer. she checks her socks for even height (continously throughout the day too), it takes her forever to tie shoes, they have to be just right, if it's not she'll do it over and over, then she has to go into the bathroom for brushing her teeth etc. and that has to be done in a certain order. She has a thing with pencils and sharpening them - it can go for a half hour or longer until nothing is left of the pencil but a stub and then it's still not sharp enough!!!!!! - well, you all know what it's like... recently my mother in law took her to a fundraiser, where she helped collect babybottles in which people collected their change for donation and she sorted all the bottles according to height and color on a table. when she had a certain color she was collecting she wouldn't accept other colors etc. people thought it was "adorable" and great that she is so organized at her age (she's 8). my thoughts are a little different on this, given my struggle with ocd. i don't want her to have to deal with this or let it get worse, i can see it taking root and i cannot allow this to take over her life.
what can i do?

 

[David Baxter PhD]

daughter shows signs

Well, first, keep in mind that obsessive-compulsive traits are a continuum ... most of us have some o-c traits but it isn't called OCD until they reach a certain extreme. Also, those sorts of behaviors aren't uncommon in young children -- in most cases, they tend to reduce and disappear with age.

However, if you are worried about it, you might consider having her evaluated by a pediatrician or child psychologists...

 

[free]

daughter shows signs

start "training" her not to behave this way now; e.g., reward her for shortening the time it takes to get ready in the morning, or start with one obscession at a time (e.g. rewards for tying her shoes faster and without checking; or for varying the order in which she does things). this will be hard and might entail you keeping a journal of the behavior you guys are working on. if things don't improve or get worse or "training" is too stressful for either of you, you might want to consult a behavior-mod. therapist.

good luck!

 

[David Baxter PhD]

daughter shows signs

start "training" her not to behave this way now; e.g., reward her for shortening the time it takes to get ready in the morning, or start with one obscession at a time (e.g. rewards for tying her shoes faster and without checking; or for varying the order in which she does things). this will be hard and might entail you keeping a journal of the behavior you guys are working on. if things don't improve or get worse or "training" is too stressful for either of you, you might want to consult a behavior-mod. therapist.

This may not be good advice, free -- it's probably better to START by consulting the therapist.

You need to be careful with this sort of approach, especially with young children. By drawing attention to the behaviors, you may make the problem worse by making the child self-conscious. Or by trying various methods of inhibiting the behavior, you may increase the child's anxiety and in that way make the problem worse.

 

[free]

daughter shows signs

true ...move that last sentence to the beginning!

 

[cleanfreak]

daughter shows signs

i appreciate the input. i have not tried to interfere with her actions so far i've only been observing. i have a inquired once before if it really was so important to have the socks perfect and she went on the defensive, started pouting and wouldn't get ready at all. basically the socks flew across the room and she on her bed. it took quite a while to reconcile with her. i will continue to observe and start a journal for now if it doesn't get better, or it becomes worse i will consult a therapist.
thanks you guys.

 

[lammers1980]

daughter shows signs

I'm not really sure what would work in a child showing signs of OCD. I remember clearly that I showed signs of this at an early age, but at that age, you hardly have a very well developed sense of insight into the issue. I never really had issues with organizing things, but I did have MANY aversions.

Hopefully you can help her out as best you can. Like David said, OCD is a spectrum and although she may have traits, it doesn't necessarily mean she has the full blown disorder.

BTW, does she have any tics? That can also be a helpful thing to look out for.