- Jan 20, 2005
I posted here earlier this year because I wasn't sure if I actually had an eating disorder. Well, turns out I did...and was hospitalized a few months later with anorexia (which, um, wasn't fun at all). One of the only friends I have visited me at the hospital and was very supportive at the time. But now...when I'm back at my normal weight and trying really hard to recover (I still have trouble with meals and the thoughts)...well, now when I need her support the most, she turns up several pounds lighter and telling me that she thinks she's developing an ED. I actually saw this coming - she's very competitive in terms of illnesses. I've spent years trying to help her with her problems, but I see now that she's more interested in getting pity than getting better. I think she can't stand the fact that I went through a serious illness. She wants the spotlight back or something. It makes me sick. Now she's going around telling me how people around her are all worried about her losing weight etc...while nobody even noticed or said anything to me when I had a bmi of 15. I can't afford to be around her right now, but I also don't want to lose her as a friend. Am I being really selfish here? I tried to tell her several times that I didn't want to be triggered...but she can't control herself. She keeps going on about losing weight and dropping dress sizes and restricting.