Getting very stressed out with my doctors

[ThatLady]

You're not a pervert, Steven. If you WERE a pervert, you wouldn't be so upset about the possibility. You're a worrier. That's what you are, and your worrying is, at this time, taking this form. It's become an obsession for you.

Is there a hotline in your area that you can call to talk to someone?

 

[Steven_v]

not that id feel comfatable talking to. iam going to try get some sleep. iam just so worried iam gona wake up a pervert

 

[ThatLady]

Do try to get some sleep, Steven. While you're at it, please try to realize that people don't just wake up perverts. You're not a pervert, and it's obvious you're not a pervert to all of us who have read what you've brought to us here. You're just a compulsive worrier and being a pervert is your "worry of the day".

I know it must be a horrible feeling, and I'll be very glad when your crisis team gets to you so that you'll have someone to help you through this. You might ask when they come if you can have a number to call in cases of emergency, like this one. :hug:

 

[stargazer]

Hi Steven. I just read thru your thread--sorry I didn't meet you earlier or catch this as it was happening from the very beginning. I only have a couple comments. From my own experience, at least in California, the doctor is often regarded as someone whose position it is only to dispense medications and make sure the levels are all right; plus, the doctor tends to be very busy with many, many patients that s(he) can't possibly keep track of. The therapist is more likely to get into the actual psychological needs of the individual patient.

When I had Kaiser insurance, I eventually saw my psychiatrist more often than the therapist (because my therapy benefits had run out) but to this day, the therapist knows me better than the doctor does. I hope that helps.

It's easy to get stressed out with the doctor. Even now, through local Mental Health, the doctor only gets up here once every three months, and my next appointment is not till January 2nd. But I've seen my therapist 5 times in the past two months or so.

I think that the people who have said to take a note from the therapist to the doctor were giving you sound advice. Coming in with a note will stand out. (I don't remember if this is something you've actually done.)

Why did you link to Mind Freedom dot Org? That confused me.

The other comment I have is that I doubt seriously you are any kind of pervert or pedophile, and certainly you are not on anyone's "list." Think of the millions of people who view pornograhy daily, many of them completely unconcerned about it. What TL said is right, though. Best not to hang out on the wrong side of the tracks, because you never know who you're going to run into out in the dark alleys of the Internet. Could you set up filters? Or parental controls? It wouldn't be a bad idea for starts.

 

[Steven_v]

so i went into a place called progress house they didnt really do anything apart from give me zopiclone the first two nights, so i checked myself out on wendsday considering i was feeling better. but now its gotten so much worse and i dont know what to do

 

[ThatLady]

Sounds like you may have checked out too soon, steven. There are no quick fixes, unfortunately. Medications are often necessary to get you to a point where real work can commence. If you keep bolting before this point is reached, it makes it much more difficult for you to recover.

 

[Steven_v]

well the progress house was making me worse, i couldnt get to sleep there and they dont have any doctors or nurses just care workers i just felt worse being there. i would have stayed if it was a proper hospital ward, but i was recieving almost less treatment there than at home. but now its gotten really bad

 

[David Baxter PhD]

I have to agree with ThatLady, Steven. You have to try to be more patient. If you continue making impulsive decisions, you'll just delay getting well.

 

[Steven_v]

so theres been no let up in the thoughts infact theyre getting worse, i think i may have something to do with the new medication cause when i take the quetiapine its just makes it worse and i feel as if its taking away my ability to fight off the thoughts. iam now at a point where iam barely able to fight them and iam afraid of what that will mean. iam not getting sleep either and like i say i feel worse when i take the quetiapine wich is also supposed to help me sleep

 

[Steven_v]

iam scared to even try and sleep tonight

 

[Steven_v]

could it be the qutiapine thats causing this again? i know it all started again about the same time they put me on olanzapine (wich iam off now). but as far as the thoughts were concerned i was fine on just fluoxatine

 

[ThatLady]

It's difficult to say what's causing it, steven. If it's getting worse, however, you really need to do something constructive about it. If it means hospitalization, then that's what it means. If it means going back to the progress house, then that's what you need to do. It's pretty obvious you can't deal with this alone.

 

[Steven_v]

i dont know if they'll have a place anymore. i'll bring it up though, iam hopefully seeing the crisis team tommorow

 

[Steven_v]

how do i get them to hospitilize me, ive had enough the thoughts have passed into being my thoughts and if they dont stop iam gona have to put a stop to them

 

[David Baxter PhD]

Ask them. Tell them you're afraid of what you might do and ask them to admit you.

 

[Halo]

Steven,

I think that if you are truly honest with your crisis team tomorrow and you dont hide anything from them it will only be then will they be able to see how much you have been struggling and what thoughts and feelings you have been having and how afraid you are.

 

[Steven_v]

but ive been discharged from the crisis team. who do i tell

 

[Halo]

Well if you are no longer under the care of your crisis team and you have no other therapist or psychiatrist then my suggestion would be to go to your local hospital and again be very honest with them about how you are and have been feeling and thinking.

Best of luck
Take care

 

[stargazer]

Maybe you can find someone else to talk to outside of the realm of the hospitals and crisis team, and perhaps that person can take you to the hospital and advocate for you, or speak on your behalf?

 

[David Baxter PhD]

Or... call your contacts on the crisis team and let them know what's happening. If they can't assist you, they can tell you who to call.