Group anxiety

[just mary]

I was at a meeting this evening and it was predominantly made up of young men. These men came across as physically strong, powerful, brash and confident. They all had brush cuts or very short hair, they all had that "Brad Pit" look, jeans, button down shirts, earings, tatoos, etc. There were a few other women, one was quite attractive - actually quite beautiful and a couple of older men.

However, I want to know if what I felt was normal for an average looking 36 year-old woman. Basically I felt invisible, I felt anxious, I felt like no one in the room would give me the time of day since I was too ugly to be noticed by the men and the women would be too busy trying to get their attention. It was horrible, I started getting all teary during the meeting and I had to leave early. I felt scared and threatened. I don't know why I felt this way, if it's even that unusual. I felt the same way in similar situations, get me around a group of young, confident, brash men and I get anxious and scared.

Does this make sense?

 

[tiadesai]

hello
if we you cant win with looks win with wits
that is how the saying goes
try to win people with your humour
talk a lot , join some personality development classes
you will feel confident then

 

[ThatLady]

Like I said once before, I've always been told that a smile is a very attractive thing, and a good conversation is always appealing.

It's not unusual to feel out of place in a gathering where people are dressed differently than you are, or seem to be more free with their expression than you're able to be. Yet, it's also an opportunity to watch and learn. If we look at our difficulties as opportunities instead of difficulties, it helps a lot. There's something to be learned in these situations just by watching what people you find yourself drawn to, or admiring, do with the situation. That gives you something to emulate.

 

[just mary]

The thing is, I would never want to emulate these people, they all seemed very shallow and superficial. In the end, I just found another meeting with people who had a bit more depth. But thanks for the advice.