Hello again

[Angel]

Hello All.

I regret that I've been getting worse while I've been away from the forum. To the point where now my mom knows about my thoughts, I'm freaking my boyfriend out more and more with my panic attacks and freaking out, and now some people know at my work about how depressed I've gotten since I had a seizure at work today caused by stress and emotions. (embarrassing when the ambulance crew has to stand there and find out my life.)

I've tried talking to the doctor about it and he just put me on Celexa and rushed me out the door. When it came to being referred to a psychaitrist here in town, he says it's like a year waiting list.

The end of May, beginning of June is going to be the hardest time for me since I know what's going to happen and it's going to throw me into emotional overture. I'm really scared about being alone and I've tried talking to my friends about it but they don't really realize how strongly I'm scared.

I'm not sure what I can do at this point. I could use some help!

 

[David Baxter PhD]

My apologies, Angel, but I talk to a lot of people in a week and I don't remember the details of your previous posts (other than that if I recall correctly you are in B.C.?).

Were you previously on any medication at all? Or is Celexa something you have just started?

My recollection tells me you were having a lot of trouble finding a therapist in your area. Are you any where close to University of British Columbia?

Did your doctor put you on that waiting list, even if it IS a year? Sometimes, a psychiatrist will see people on a "consult" while they are on the waiting list, on a day where they have a cancellation...

 

[healthbound]

Hi Angel,

I'm sorry to hear that you are feeling so bad. I live in BC as well and was also told that I would need to wait for about a year to see a psychiatrist. I was really shocked because they knew that I was suicidal. Additionally, my sister killed herself and that was one of the contributors to both my PTSD, depression and suicidal desires. I saw this as an emergency situation, but I interpreted the lack of available help to mean that no one else did.

What I did was called a previous therapist who happened to know the psychiatrist who's waiting list I was on. I stayed on the waiting list, but was now added to their list of "in case someone cancels" and this is how I got my first appointment. After explaining my situation to the psychiatrist, I began to see him weekly.

There was another organization that I found to be helpful too. It's called the Bridge Program and it's run through Lions Gate Hospital. They saw me once a week and assessed what program/resource would be best for me. It was also a fairly lengthy process, but at least I was seeing SOMEONE.

Regardless, I remember feeling very angry and frustrated like no one cared. My family has never been very supportive or present and so when I finally worked up enough courage to tell my doctor how I was really feeling and thinking but was delayed in seeing someone, I wondered if anyone cared whether I lived or died.

I also went through this a month before my sister took her life. There is a real need for more resources. I have been very frustrated about the lack of available help for those in desperate need especially given the high number of deaths by suicide.

I'm not sure if the thoughts you mentioned are suicidal or not and I am fairly new to this forum so I don't know your history or how long you've been posting, but I hope you continue as it sounds like it was helpful to you before.

Regards,

healthbound
ACTUALIZING