David Baxter PhD
Late Founder
How Domestic Violence Affects Our Kids
by Kara T. Tamanini, Kids Awareness Series
January 23rd, 2010
Our culture unfortunately already seems to encourage that boys/men act aggressively and show their power in a physical manner. Women are perceived as weak oftentimes and are easily preyed upon by abusers. Currently, our culture encourages women to act in a submissive manner and to accept male domination. Unfortunately, it is these very values that increase the likelihood that some men will become abusive to their wives and also their children.
Even in today’s times, society will often encourage girls no matter the extent of the abuse, to stay with their abusers. Society often expects men to use physical means to control their surroundings and this includes their wives/girlfriends and their children. With all this said, where does this leave the children who are witnessing these learned abusive behaviors in their home or are being abused themselves.
First and foremost, children that are in an abusive environment almost always suffer from low self-esteem. They often have cognitive or language delays, delays in their overall development, and stress-related problems. These kids are without a doubt the most stressed out children that are seen for psychological treatment. They either are very angry; belligerent and exhibit acting out behaviors or they are quiet; withdrawn and are willing to say very little out of fear of reprisal. These children often feel guilty for not stopping the abuse and younger children often do not understand the abuse and they take responsibility for the abuse occurring to their mother or to themselves.
Children that witness domestic violence seem to live in a constant state of extreme anxiety and their school work and their social relationships really suffer. The boys that witness this abuse often become abusers themselves and the girls are often battered in their own relationships as an adult. Because the old addage really applies here, you do what you know or what you are familiar with. These children struggle in school and problems academically due to lack of concentration and frequent absences from school as a result of stress-related illnesses such as constant headaches, stomach problems, or difficulty sleeping at night.
Whether or not a child is witnessing abuse in their home or is a victim of the abuse themselves, the psychological effects are often the same, these are children that are traumatized for years to come. Anger and violence play a very negative role in the overall development of a child. Mental health treatment with abused children tends to be long and arduous as a result of the damaging effects. As always, if you suspect that a child is living in this kind of environment or is being abused themselves, please contact your local abuse hotline.
by Kara T. Tamanini, Kids Awareness Series
January 23rd, 2010
Our culture unfortunately already seems to encourage that boys/men act aggressively and show their power in a physical manner. Women are perceived as weak oftentimes and are easily preyed upon by abusers. Currently, our culture encourages women to act in a submissive manner and to accept male domination. Unfortunately, it is these very values that increase the likelihood that some men will become abusive to their wives and also their children.
Even in today’s times, society will often encourage girls no matter the extent of the abuse, to stay with their abusers. Society often expects men to use physical means to control their surroundings and this includes their wives/girlfriends and their children. With all this said, where does this leave the children who are witnessing these learned abusive behaviors in their home or are being abused themselves.
First and foremost, children that are in an abusive environment almost always suffer from low self-esteem. They often have cognitive or language delays, delays in their overall development, and stress-related problems. These kids are without a doubt the most stressed out children that are seen for psychological treatment. They either are very angry; belligerent and exhibit acting out behaviors or they are quiet; withdrawn and are willing to say very little out of fear of reprisal. These children often feel guilty for not stopping the abuse and younger children often do not understand the abuse and they take responsibility for the abuse occurring to their mother or to themselves.
Children that witness domestic violence seem to live in a constant state of extreme anxiety and their school work and their social relationships really suffer. The boys that witness this abuse often become abusers themselves and the girls are often battered in their own relationships as an adult. Because the old addage really applies here, you do what you know or what you are familiar with. These children struggle in school and problems academically due to lack of concentration and frequent absences from school as a result of stress-related illnesses such as constant headaches, stomach problems, or difficulty sleeping at night.
Whether or not a child is witnessing abuse in their home or is a victim of the abuse themselves, the psychological effects are often the same, these are children that are traumatized for years to come. Anger and violence play a very negative role in the overall development of a child. Mental health treatment with abused children tends to be long and arduous as a result of the damaging effects. As always, if you suspect that a child is living in this kind of environment or is being abused themselves, please contact your local abuse hotline.
:hug: Just my own guilt at times that gets the better of me...My family also has both men and women abusers. Tonight, my mother just stands out in the herd.
