Insight into Feelings

[David Baxter PhD]

INSIGHT INTO FEELINGS

1. ANGER AND BLAME

I resent...

I'm outraged by...

I'm fed up with...

I can't stand...

I hate...

I can't forgive...

I needed...


2. HURT AND SADNESS

I feel hurt by...

I feel sad when...

I'm disappointed because...

I feel awful because...

I want...


3. FEAR AND INSECURITY

I am anxious because...

I am afraid that...

What scares me is...

I'm worried about...

I want...


4. GUILT AND RESPONSIBILITY

I regret....

I may be to blame for...

I feel sympathy for...

I didn't mean to...

Forgive me for...

I wish...


5. FORGIVENESS, UNDERSTANDING, DESIRE, AND LOVE

I appreciate...

I realize...

I forgive...

I value...

I love...

I want...

I hope...

 

[GDPR]

old post,but I can see that it would be very helpful and wanted to bump it up.

 

[Banned]

I did this exercise a long time ago. I wonder how it would compare if I did it again today. Thanks for bumping, LIT.

 

[PrincessX]

How did this exercise help you?

 

[Banned]

It makes you stop and really think about what you're feeling. I put a LOT of energy into avoiding my feelings, and if you put an honest effort into this you can't avoid them.

 

[Banned]

And actually if you base some of your goals for therapy on some of your responses, it's a good measuring stick as to whether you are meeting those goals. Are you still feeling the same thing one, two, five years later? Does it have the same intensity? Things like that might be worth reviewing or discussing throughout therapy if you think it might be helpful.

 

[PrincessX]

OK, thanks Turtle. I actually do not like setting specific goals. I often find that goals limit the outcomes, especially if set too soon. I read how feeling happy might not be a true measure of wellness or a requirement to have a fruitful life. Today I read something funny in the medical care plans documentation. It stated: After settling to comfort, patient was comortable. We could not measure the results of the painful - corrected to pain -intervention, due to the lack of nonverbal indicators. The goal of 2 points pain reduction is unmet.

 

[Banned]

I think goals are important for a bunch of reasons. My background is business so analytics come in to play but if I go into therapy with no goals and spend $20,000 over two years, at the end of two years how do I measure what I've accomplished? If anything...some things require concrete goals, others not so much. I've had several goals in therapy - getting a diagnosis (got one), finding a good med combo (found one), finding a good therapist (found one),mlearning to think differently (learned some CBT), learning alternate coping strategies besides suicide by default (still working on this), processing early childhood issues (mostly done I guess), trying to find coping strategies for day to day life - this included getting me on a modified work schedule that my therapist had to write letters and send documentation to support. Without a diagnosis this would not have happened.

Some days my goal is just to get through the day or week without having a complete melt down - so a little broader. I don't make decisions well when I'm stressed so I seek guidance if I have to make a decision when I don't feel I can. That's another goal - function better under stress and manage myself better. Regulate my moods, my temper, my actions and reactions...

So I bet if you really thought about it, you'd find you have some goals. I have a million more,and I've had a really crappy day which is the only reason they come to mind so easily, unfortunately.

And goals don't have to limit outcomes - as you achieve a goal, you can alter or reset it time and again. Goals should evolve. Otherwise I'd still be in kindergarten.

 

[PrincessX]

Thank you so much for the reply. I agree we all have goals even if we don't realize them. Seems like you have invested and gained a lot from being in therapy. I was actually trying to be funny, but I had such a crappy day that I am still annoyed and I guess I didn't sound as funny as I wanted to

---------- Post Merged at 08:03 PM ---------- Previous Post was at 07:35 PM ----------

I have also done a business degree and absolutely loved it, it gives you basic operational skills, unlike my nursing and rehab studies, that made me fed up and nauseated from developing care plans.

---------- Post Merged at 08:20 PM ---------- Previous Post was at 08:03 PM ----------

Sorry for the last part.

 

[GDPR]

I did this exercise this morning.Now I'm not quite sure what I am supposed to do with it.Since I am doing this on my own without my therapist,what do I do?

Am I supposed to take it further and write about what I can do to change how I feel,or is this just a way to acknowledge my feelings?

Maybe I'm just making this more complicated than it should be?

---------- Post Merged at 09:24 AM ---------- Previous Post was at 08:38 AM ----------

Is this just a way to be completely honest with myself about what I'm feeling?

 

[David Baxter PhD]

It's an aid to exploring your feelings and the major themes in your life currently. Because of the sequence of the items, if you do them in order it also can sometimes help you towards resolution and acceptance, and perhaps forgiveness - of yourself or of other people - so you can let go of destructive feelings like anger or hatred.