More threads by CarlaMarie

CarlaMarie

Member
The new antidepressant is cymbalta and she also prescribed clonazepam. I am aware that clonazepam is a benzodiazepine. To be quite frank although not a drug of choice for me I have fear in me. They are habit forming (I also know benzo addicts) I am afraid I will like the effect and it will trigger my addiction and then off I will go chasing the high. Protocall for us addicts when prescribed pain pills for things like surgeries is 10 pills and my doc followed that protocol so I don't feel like she is screwing me. I guess that is taking care of me. Maybe I might need a light tranquilizer to get through this?
 

CarlaMarie

Member
I am on day 4 of my withdrawal. I have felt some dizziness, nausa and had a few headaches. I am somewhat emotional but no more than usual. What is really weird is I actually feel better. I have more energy and I feel less depressed. I have had some panic but I have been able to remember that the situation will work out or the feeling will pass (like the babies tantrum). I normally freeze and can't think it through to the end. I am more impulsive. I feel like a fog has been lifted. I haven't felt a need to take the clonazepam. I see my Doc tomorrow.
 

tryindbt

Member
That's great CarlaMarie! I am so proud of you for looking into yourself and finding out what you may need to become a better you and then following through with what you need to get done- and overcoming your fears at the same time. That's great! You are doing more than just taking care of yourself, you are becoming a stronger you, doing things you thought you couldn't and overcoming fears that held you back- you are a concrete cookie! :) I'm very happy for you.

I once tried to taper off effexor xr (before I realized it was something I needed long-term), and I also developed dizziness, etc. It took about 4 days for the dizziness to go away for me - so, remember this from someone that has gone through it- it will go away. You will be fine, just make sure to remember that. I did end up going back onto effexor xr after a traumatic event got me crying and i was not able to climb out of that depression myself. I have been on effexor xr for approximately 8 years now (from the beginning & including the break) and I have also wondered if it is something that can lose it's effectiveness because sometimes I feel like I am more depressed than I should be. I would be very interested in knowing how things are going with you and how you will feel once your transition is made. Please keep us posted on this and how you are feeling. And please remember that I am soo sooo so proud of you because you have taken a brave step by overcoming your fears to become a better you! You are doing awesome! ;)
 

CarlaMarie

Member
Thanks T,
I just saw my psychiatrist. She knocked my dose down from 150mg to 75mg and increased the cymbalta from 30 to 60 mg. I start that tomorrow. I feel great. The dizziness has gone away. I feel like a big grey cloud has been lifted. My doc said I am having mild withdrawal sypmptoms. She is not concerned about me. I see her back in 7 days then we go down to 37 mg for a week. Then I stop. At any point I can take a 37 mg capsle or benzo. I haven't found it necessary to do either. I am finding my anxiety and panic managable. I am in kind of shock and awe that I am actually feeling exited about the future right now. For the first time in a long time I thnk I can actually accomplish some of my goals.:dance2:
 

tryindbt

Member
That's awesome CarlaMarie! I am so happy for you! I am really happy about your outlook on the future and yourself in that future. I think that is great and you are doing a great job! :) I'm glad the dizzyness is gone- that was probably the worst part of the whole thing for me. But, that was the only thing I had- I am so glad you are out of it - can I ask you why do you feel a gray cloud has been lifted? Do you think the medicine was bringing you down in some way? Does your psychiatrist think that you will improve on the other medicine?

:2thumbs:
 

CarlaMarie

Member
Day 6 today I went down to 75 mg of Effexor and up to 60 of Cymbalta. I am feeling emotions today. I feel sad and I felt angry as a reaction to some stuff going on. It is manageable with the tools I have for coping. I notice I am sleeping better? I haven't had the dreams or the sweats. I still get tired mid-day. When awake I have felt more energy. I napped hard. I notice a difference in my pain. I hurt more. My hope is the Cymbalta will kick in for pain management for my Fibromyalgia. I will keep y'all posted on my progress as this change progresses. I appreciate the interest in me.
 

CarlaMarie

Member
I made a mistake. I didn't take the 75 mg of Effexor yesterday. It was an oversight I didn't put it in my pill manager. All of a sudden after I took my meds this morning it hit me.:banghead: As I was falling rabidly in a deep hole of overwhelming emotions...I felt like a complete failure and felt the need to punish myself by cutting. I felt alone and that was the only way to cope.

Once I realized my mistake I decided to give myself a break. I took a mental health day. I ate, took a nap the racing thoughts were still there. I keep having images of cutting. I am trying not to make plans. It was then I decided to take a benzo.

So for now I am staying busy taking action. Staying away from people who **** me off. I am working on my afgan. I am still struggling with cutting issues. I am doing my best.
 

Retired

Member
I didn't take the 75 mg of Effexor yesterday

Forgetting to take your med one day is not a mistake, just an oversight..easy to happen with a busy schedule.

Actually with Effexor, one missed dose is not a problem at all, just take the regular dose again the following day. Do not try to make up the missing dose, just bypass the missed dose and carry on.

You may find one of those pill boxes showing each day of the week helpful to remind you if you've taken your medications each day. They are available in pharmacies as well as dollar stores, even Wal*Mart!
 

CarlaMarie

Member
Yes I went back to the regular dosage scedule as soon as I realized I hadn't taken it. That was around 10:30 am. I am just now starting to feel calm. I was not well today. I lost it a few times and had to make amends. I am grateful I didn't do any major harm. I was not my normal me. Whatever that is. I normally don't get angry and loose it.

I have one of those medication organizors and I just didn't put the Efexor in it. Won't do that again. I guess it is what you call a mistake. Change does that to me. It confuses me with all the meds I take for this and that. I'm set for a week until the next change.Wish me well :hmm:.
 

Dragonfly

Global Moderator & Practitioner
Member
Absolutely wish you well CarlaMarie. Here's the thing that I have noticed - pharmacy companies have very sophisticated studies that tell providers how long the meds stay in our bodies, potential drug interactions, potential side-effects and potential withdrawal symptoms etc. The thing that I have noticed in practice, is that when I am working with someone to switch their meds around (like going up on something while going down on something else), in general, people seem much more sensitive to a single missed dose than when everything is rock-stable. If I go strictly from the info from the pharmacy companies, even when doses have been stable for (say) 5 days, if the overall picture is one of changing meds / doses, then people seem to be at a heightened sensitivity if even one dose of a med is missed. I have to say, with respect to the pharm. companies, I think this is because there are still things we don't know about chemical receptors and hightened or decreased sensitivity - and what happens when we start changing drug concentrations.

But please understand that I am giving you my clinical impression. This is not based on formal research.

However CarlaMarie, you are right. A missed dose is a mistake. Not bigger or smaller than that. And you get to make 'em, just like the rest of us. Take care.
 

CarlaMarie

Member
Thank you DF. I needed to hear that. Today however I am still feeling emotional. Angry, sad , and I think or feel my way into a self hatred trap where I feel the need to cut to get out. I feel alone. I have done the self care I did yesterday except take the benzo. Should I continue on wil it go away?
 

Dragonfly

Global Moderator & Practitioner
Member
So CarlaMarie. If someone came to you and said the things that you said in your last post, and asked the last question that you asked, what would your answer be? I don't mean to be glib or minimize your struggles - its just that I really believe in you. I really believe that you have the safe, reasonable answers over what to do to keep yourself safe. And that you would reassure the person about how they feel now, will eventually pass. Please believe and do exactly as you would tell me or anyone else. I know you are hurting, but that doesn't detract from your wisdom.
 

CarlaMarie

Member
I will walk through the self care. In my head I am going to be pouting, kicking, screaming, acting childish because it is so hard for me to be grown up. I want someone to take care of me. I prepared I know what to do. Thank you for your patience with me.
 

CarlaMarie

Member
I am feeling more normal now. I wonder if feeling pissed off is a good part of feeling normal? I have reason to be pissed off. Maybe empowered is a better word for pissed of. Anyway, good news my pain is better! I have more energy. No headaches, nausa, or the like. Now I get to do it all again and cut the dose in half to 37.5. I see my psychiatrist tomorrow. Ye, ha!
 

tryindbt

Member
You are doing great CarlaMarie- Before I read your last post here- I was thinking "YOU CAN DO IT!" "You can do it and I know you can and I wish you knew how much you can!!!" AND, I am so glad you were able to see it through and everyone was able to help you. Just remember this the next time you feel this way. :2thumbs:
 

Dragonfly

Global Moderator & Practitioner
Member
Nicely done!!! Maybe the next step-down (to 37.5 mg) won't be as hard on your system as the last step-down. But how nice for you that your pain is better! Outstanding!
 
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