AmZ
Member
I'm so stressed out. Why does life work out like this? If I didn't have enough things on my mind, now loads of things have come up in the last few days that I simply can't take or deal with.
Because of the depression and feeling as I am, I've let everything go the last few months and everything is a mess.
I had a social worker but she went to move to work in another ward so now I have no social worker. I need to go tomorrow to request it from my psychiatrist because I really need a lot of help with stuff.
I know when I get ultra stressed out because I get a breakout of acne. Oh boy. It's horrible.
I'm trying just to focus on the ECT which I'm starting in two days time. That's a big enough thing.
I haven't checked my bank account for months and I have no clue which benefits I receive and what is taken. My bank account is a total mess. The rehab program took a ton of money for an entire months rent when I was only back there for four days and then returned to the hospital.
Then the 5 months of rent which I payed the rehab program, I need to go to the interior ministry to receive a special code and then go to another place with a ton of paperwork that I don't have and they are meant to reimburse me for all the rent I paid for.
Where I was living. My ex roommate that is still living there has now told us last minute that she's leaving the apartment so we need to go and collect a load of stuff from there. I'm not allowed out of the hospital because I'm in a bad way so my sister is going with my dad and his wife with their rented car and I'll speak to my sister in the phone and we'll go through what I want to keep and not keep. It looks like I am returning to just having two suitcases to my name when I emigrated here 6 years ago. I know they're just material things but I'm at some point going to have to start afresh once again.
Way too much on my mind and I'm trying to focus on my recovery and trying to get better.
I'm not looking after myself and have put on more weight. It's getting ridiculous. I'm really upset about it. I'm smoking and I'm upset about it. Lots of things are bothering me.
I haven't drank even one glass of water for several days and am seriously dehydrated. Until today it turned in to a terrible migraine with vomiting etc. highly unpleasant. No tablets have taken the headache off and I'm in bed now and have to try and fall asleep with a bad headache.
They tried to take blood this morning and I'm so dehydrated that they couldn't get a vein. Now I'm worried about Thursday and the ECT and needing to have an IV in my hand and there are no veins there! So I really need to start drinking more water before then.
I've got two chipped teeth and there is a dentist here in the hospital on Wednesdays so I really need to go tomorrow. I tried to get help from the nurses in the last two weeks about what I need to do in order to go there but everyone's telling me different things. I've really got to push tomorrow to get me teeth sorted out.
I am one whining person. I'm so sorry. Going from migraines, to TMJ in my jaw. My jaw is totally misaligned and I can't even out my head down on a pillow without being in a lot of pain.
And I kicked a door a couple of weeks ago after I got angry about something (long story). Was the first time I've been outwardly angry in my life and I went crazy. Had to go and X-ray my foot and they said nothing is broken. But two weeks later, it's still hurting me more even than before.
I could go on. I just don't see if it possible for me to be able to live such a stressful life. Why is life so tough?
Once again, I'm sorry for the moaning. I know we all have our problems. I just find everything very intensively but I know that I need to focus on my own health now and getting better and stronger so that I can fight this easier.
Thanks for listening to me
Because of the depression and feeling as I am, I've let everything go the last few months and everything is a mess.
I had a social worker but she went to move to work in another ward so now I have no social worker. I need to go tomorrow to request it from my psychiatrist because I really need a lot of help with stuff.
I know when I get ultra stressed out because I get a breakout of acne. Oh boy. It's horrible.
I'm trying just to focus on the ECT which I'm starting in two days time. That's a big enough thing.
I haven't checked my bank account for months and I have no clue which benefits I receive and what is taken. My bank account is a total mess. The rehab program took a ton of money for an entire months rent when I was only back there for four days and then returned to the hospital.
Then the 5 months of rent which I payed the rehab program, I need to go to the interior ministry to receive a special code and then go to another place with a ton of paperwork that I don't have and they are meant to reimburse me for all the rent I paid for.
Where I was living. My ex roommate that is still living there has now told us last minute that she's leaving the apartment so we need to go and collect a load of stuff from there. I'm not allowed out of the hospital because I'm in a bad way so my sister is going with my dad and his wife with their rented car and I'll speak to my sister in the phone and we'll go through what I want to keep and not keep. It looks like I am returning to just having two suitcases to my name when I emigrated here 6 years ago. I know they're just material things but I'm at some point going to have to start afresh once again.
Way too much on my mind and I'm trying to focus on my recovery and trying to get better.
I'm not looking after myself and have put on more weight. It's getting ridiculous. I'm really upset about it. I'm smoking and I'm upset about it. Lots of things are bothering me.
I haven't drank even one glass of water for several days and am seriously dehydrated. Until today it turned in to a terrible migraine with vomiting etc. highly unpleasant. No tablets have taken the headache off and I'm in bed now and have to try and fall asleep with a bad headache.
They tried to take blood this morning and I'm so dehydrated that they couldn't get a vein. Now I'm worried about Thursday and the ECT and needing to have an IV in my hand and there are no veins there! So I really need to start drinking more water before then.
I've got two chipped teeth and there is a dentist here in the hospital on Wednesdays so I really need to go tomorrow. I tried to get help from the nurses in the last two weeks about what I need to do in order to go there but everyone's telling me different things. I've really got to push tomorrow to get me teeth sorted out.
I am one whining person. I'm so sorry. Going from migraines, to TMJ in my jaw. My jaw is totally misaligned and I can't even out my head down on a pillow without being in a lot of pain.
And I kicked a door a couple of weeks ago after I got angry about something (long story). Was the first time I've been outwardly angry in my life and I went crazy. Had to go and X-ray my foot and they said nothing is broken. But two weeks later, it's still hurting me more even than before.
I could go on. I just don't see if it possible for me to be able to live such a stressful life. Why is life so tough?
Once again, I'm sorry for the moaning. I know we all have our problems. I just find everything very intensively but I know that I need to focus on my own health now and getting better and stronger so that I can fight this easier.
Thanks for listening to me
