stargazer
Member
This is only my own experience, but I'll post it for whatever it's worth.
Since having acquired a bipolar diagnosis and having attempted to establish a support group among real-life friends or acquaintances, I have been continually frustrated with how absolutely nobody in my life will go so far as even to read the symptoms of bipolar disorder or of a manic episode and try to perceive how they might apply to me, and how their understanding of my condition might help me. This includes brother, sister, daughter, stepdaughter, and all my friends. Every time I bring it up, a wall goes up immediately. I feel as though I have tread upon the verboten. I feel immediately uncomfortable, and ultimately I cease to even try to communicate with them along these lines.
Whenever I have had a diagnosed manic episode, it is almost invariably regarded, in all its components, as a moral failing on my part. Whenever I have been in the hospital, and the clinicians have asked me about family support for my condition, I have had to to respond that my family could care less. In fact, as soon as my symptoms begin to show, no sooner does everyone in my life withdraw from me completely.
I realize this might sound like a bitter complaint, but I am really only trying to make an observation. I also want to see if anyone else can relate to this. My family probably does actually care, but they have a funny way of showing it. My daughter insists that my stepdaughter loves me, yet my stepdaughter hasn't spoken me or returned an email or a phone call in over a year. I suspect that the reasoning among my family and friends is that this is something I am going to have to take care of myself, and that is beyond the scope of their understanding. I can see that perspective to an extent, but what I don't see is why no one makes an attempt to understand. Even if they're not going to be able to understand *completely,* they could at least give it a try. None of us understands these conditions completely, after all.
The end result of this kind of removal of support is that whatever difficulties I am undergoing as a result of exacerbations of my condition are then compounded by loneliness and a deep sense of rejection. Every time I have been in the hospital, I have been the only patient there who received no visitors.
I also would like to add that it actually bothers me even more to have to deal with the constant questions: "Is your family helping you find a place to live? Is your family supportive of your recovery?" - and so forth; than the actual dismissal of my family from my tangible support group. I honestly think I have a harder time answering questions - "Why doesn't your brother buy you a car?" (that's a good one!), than I do with the actual experience of isolation.
I don't know if this says more about me than it does about my family and my choice and friends, but I really hope that the situation will change. It's difficult enough having to deal with an ongoing mental health condition, without also having to feel rejected or even morally judged on account of it.
Since having acquired a bipolar diagnosis and having attempted to establish a support group among real-life friends or acquaintances, I have been continually frustrated with how absolutely nobody in my life will go so far as even to read the symptoms of bipolar disorder or of a manic episode and try to perceive how they might apply to me, and how their understanding of my condition might help me. This includes brother, sister, daughter, stepdaughter, and all my friends. Every time I bring it up, a wall goes up immediately. I feel as though I have tread upon the verboten. I feel immediately uncomfortable, and ultimately I cease to even try to communicate with them along these lines.
Whenever I have had a diagnosed manic episode, it is almost invariably regarded, in all its components, as a moral failing on my part. Whenever I have been in the hospital, and the clinicians have asked me about family support for my condition, I have had to to respond that my family could care less. In fact, as soon as my symptoms begin to show, no sooner does everyone in my life withdraw from me completely.
I realize this might sound like a bitter complaint, but I am really only trying to make an observation. I also want to see if anyone else can relate to this. My family probably does actually care, but they have a funny way of showing it. My daughter insists that my stepdaughter loves me, yet my stepdaughter hasn't spoken me or returned an email or a phone call in over a year. I suspect that the reasoning among my family and friends is that this is something I am going to have to take care of myself, and that is beyond the scope of their understanding. I can see that perspective to an extent, but what I don't see is why no one makes an attempt to understand. Even if they're not going to be able to understand *completely,* they could at least give it a try. None of us understands these conditions completely, after all.
The end result of this kind of removal of support is that whatever difficulties I am undergoing as a result of exacerbations of my condition are then compounded by loneliness and a deep sense of rejection. Every time I have been in the hospital, I have been the only patient there who received no visitors.
I also would like to add that it actually bothers me even more to have to deal with the constant questions: "Is your family helping you find a place to live? Is your family supportive of your recovery?" - and so forth; than the actual dismissal of my family from my tangible support group. I honestly think I have a harder time answering questions - "Why doesn't your brother buy you a car?" (that's a good one!), than I do with the actual experience of isolation.
I don't know if this says more about me than it does about my family and my choice and friends, but I really hope that the situation will change. It's difficult enough having to deal with an ongoing mental health condition, without also having to feel rejected or even morally judged on account of it.