Abusive Therapists

[Daffodil]

Dear Readers:

Some time ago - about a year and half ago - I sought advice from this forum about complaining against my therapists (who bills to OHIP). I was emotionally fragile, and still am, but with the support of my friends, I placed a complain against the Doctor who was abusing me with the College of Physicians and Surgeons of Ontario.

At first the investigator was dismissive, she asked me if anyone else was in the room with me. She then told me that I had no evidence, and it's like ggoing to the police without evidence. I then submitted two audio recordings to her (which luckily, I had caught him on tape abusing me). Most times I was too nervous, or had forgotton to record him. I did not record him from the beginning, just towards the end (i.e starting Jan 2013,after I made up my mind to complain).

After the investigator listened to the tape she was shocked. She called me back and told he's being abusive, and asked me why I didn't complain before. She said he is inappropriate and abusive, amongst other things. She asked me to get help processing the trauma.

The complain is ongoing, there are things which I have to do, and it's nerve racking everytime I have deal with it or send something to the College. Very painful.

ALhtough my friend and everyone else tells me Iam doing the right thing, I am feeling huge amount of guilt and loss.

I am sad and I feel like a bad person for complaining against him. Even though he was abusive I still liked him, I still like him, and sometimes I forget the abuse and think about the nice things he's said to me...which is the only thing that matters.

Complaining is not an easy process, I felt anger, then guilt, then loss, and noww confusion Above all I wish he wasn't abusive, I wish he treated me with respect and professionalism. I am very sad.


For anyone's information, the doctor works in Ottawa (Orleans) ON.

 

[Retired]

You are to be commended for your courage and determination for the positive action you have taken. You have not only done yourself a service by developing your self esteem and independence but you might also, hopefully, prevent similar abuse to others in the future.

There is no excuse or justification for anyone, particularly someone in an authority or caregiver capacity to abuse the trust of someone in their care.

Abusive behaviour is clearly unjustifiable and you did the right thing.

 

[Daffodil]

Kind words, Steve. Yes, people have told me I have taken a "bold step" and "a stand". I hope others will be helped by me putting in the complaint

 

[wheelchairdemon]

I am sad and I feel like a bad person for complaining against him. Even though he was abusive I still liked him, I still like him, and sometimes I forget the abuse and think about the nice things he's said to me...which is the only thing that matters.

You are to be commended for complaining. It's not easy. I know you may feel some guilt, but think of this way. With the investigation, the abuse will be stopped and it won't be hurting anyone else either. In other words, your brave actions will be helping to protect others as well.

I'm so glad the College listened to the recordings and took action.

 

[Andy]

I think this is very commendable Daffodil!

There was a Psychiatrist in Calgary that was charged last year (I think) with being inappropriate and he had been that way with a few patients but none of them said anything because they thought no one would believe them because after all they were going to a Psychiatrist (and the stigma that goes with that and mental illness) and one man did the same thing as you, got his video proof and the "doctor" was charged.

The fact that you got your proof and proceeded was very brave. I am sure you helped others from experiencing the same thing from this person. With that said I hope that your experience with one bad doctor does not hinder you from seeing a new one. There are plenty of great ones out there.

Good job.

 

[wheelchairdemon]

I'm curious; is there a statute of limitations on reporting these rogue doctors? I live in Ontario and I have tons of written proof contained in the medical files from a local hospital.

The damage of the severely defamatory statements (that can be proven aren't even true) still results in dismissive attitudes to this day.

The opinion of that psychiatrist has been repeated over and over again and then cited as a reason to dismiss me from all forms of medical care locally.

I have to travel out-of-town to get unbiased health care.

The offending file was written in 1997 and, up until 3 weeks ago when I got all my files put in a lock box, was used as a reason to refuse all forms of health care (even for proven physical issues) ever since.

 

[David Baxter PhD]

I don't know, WCD. There may be some information at Home | College of Physicians and Surgeons of Ontario or Complaints | Policies & Publications | The College of Physicians and Surgeons of Ontario or Ontario Psychiatric Association - OPA

 

[Daffodil]

Ok, well this scares me. What if Dr, Mitchell does the same thing to me? What if he "blacklists" me from receiving future health care? T

---------- Post Merged at 11:38 PM ---------- Previous Post was at 11:35 PM ----------

Andy, the main reason I took so long to go forward with my complaint was because I feared that it was going to be his word against mine. It's sad that patients have to feel intimidated like this, and has to resort to taping therapists, in order to be believed - as the investigator asked me "was there anyone in the room with you , you have no evidence" and then proceeded to act dismissive.
I think something shoudl be done with the CPSO, so that patients feel like they are being heard.

---------- Post Merged at 11:39 PM ---------- Previous Post was at 11:38 PM ----------

Andy, the main reason I took so long to go forward with my complaint was because I feared that it was going to be his word against mine. It's sad that patients have to feel intimidated like this, and has to resort to taping therapists, in order to be believed - as the investigator asked me "was there anyone in the room with you , you have no evidence" and then proceeded to act dismissive.
I think something shoudl be done with the CPSO, so that patients feel like they are being heard.

 

[MHealthJo]

I can't imagine anything more difficult, Daffodil, and you are to be congratulated for doing something that is so necessary to avoid this happening to others, who may not be in a position to do what you did. Patients really need to be protected from abusive situations, even if they somehow feel that their doctor is not "all bad".

A very high standard of trustworthy behaviour needs to be expected and required from doctors and therapists, so that trust can happen and so that people can receive the help that they need.

Daffodil I think after doing what you have done, and after you have this proof and have the investigator involved, anything bad or unfair that this doctor could try to do to you would be severely limited. (From what I understand, a large amount of the trouble that Wheelchairdemon has gone through was to do with her abusive, powerful, and very influential family systematically discounting anything she said, often pre-empting her, and feeding lies about her to pretty much every health professional in the area for a very long period of time - just an incredibly absurd, awful, exceptionally unusual situation. That is not the same situation as you...)

You just hold onto your recordings, okay, or find a way to make sure you have a copy. xx

 

[gardener]

Daffodil, thank you for coming forward. I'm sorry that you are suffering because you did the right thing. I hope you don't get black-listed.

From my own personal experience, I've encountered a few bad therapists, and my last psychiatrist talked all over town about me...I was even alienated by a vet I had used for several decades. I have no idea what she told people, but whatever it was, it was bad enough to alienate these people. I could totally relate to wheelchairdemon's story.

It IS terrible that you get all this abuse and alienation because you ask for help. They hold that up to the mentally ill like it is your only hope, and like being normal is just within grasp if you follow along with your all-knowing therapist. It's a system that is badly flawed...but they don't have any better answers for problems like ours...so there it is.

I'm just very sorry for what you have had to endure. In my opinion, you did the right thing. I'm sincerely sorry this has all worked out this way.

 

[Daffodil]

Thank you Gardener. He used his powerful influence over me to cause me a lot of harm. I did follow his suggestions blindly causing me to waste up to $10K . It ws all what he wanted for me, I could never voice my own opinion wihtout him telling me to shut up or get out.

 

[MHealthJo]

Gosh, how awful. I am wondering - just in case people really need help and treatment, but are terrified of the possibility of something like this - what would you guys say to those people?

What suggestions, advice, or reassurance might you offer, to help a person feel that it is still best to try to move forward, and to be prepared to know what to do, just in case they have horrible luck and need to stay safe from/recognize a dodgy therapist?

 

[Daffodil]

Gosh, how awful. I am wondering - just in case people really need help and treatment, but are terrified of the possibility of something like this - what would you guys say to those people?

What suggestions, advice, or reassurance might you offer, to help a person feel that it is still best to try to move forward, and to be prepared to know what to do, just in case they have horrible luck and need to stay safe from/recognize a dodgy therapist?

MJHealth: I believe in the power of psychotherapy to heal but only if the therapist is working in your best interest, not foisting what he thinks is right for you. I think others should go to Therapy with an open mind, but please do an interview on your first session or so...go with a list of questions you have to ask the therapist ( I neglected to do this to my own detriment). Ask about the type of therapy he or she does, his qualifications, his philosophy etc. Ask some hardball questions just like an employer does to a potential employee (Why should I hire you?) Then go with your gut instinct.

Do some reading on how psychotherapy works - for instance, there are things like resistence, various forms of transference, a good therapist will try to create tension for the patient, so that he/she can get working on their life - but they should be informing you of this ( according to the Ontario College of Surgeons and Physicians)>

The thing to recognize is that patients go their in a vulnerable state, and their judgement are already impaired, therefore it may be very easy to trust someone despite your better judgement.

I continued with my doctor, despite some shocking and reprehensible things he said in the earlier sessions. I thought he must really trust me to be saying this unacceptable and politically inappropriate things...again, I was in a vulnerable state, and he lent a willing ear. He seemed to be on my side, agreeing with me at first, validating my concerns - but really he was forming a theraputic liasion with me, and this does not have any personal meaning for him, but it did for me.

I placed my trust entirely in the system, his education and the fact that he was a doctor. I thought that he would always act in my best interest. I did not consider that he was a person and therefore possibly flawed. I held him in very high regard, so when he began abusing me, I quickly blamed myself. I thought I must have done or said something wrong, next time it's going to be better. I will act differently. I convinced my self that he wasn't always going to be abusive, I looked forward to the good sessions, which were intermittent.

On the one hand I am glad I complained, but on the other hand, it's not easy to pull the plug on a relationship that has been going on for 3 years, twice a week. It's tremendously painful for my brain to adjust to the fact, that I won't be seeing Dr. Mitchell anymore.

ON that note, I think the CPSO needs to make some reforms on how it handles patients complaints. There is absolutely no support for the patient whilst the complaint is on going . The investigator only told me to get someone to help me process the trauma, and w hilst she was sympathetic and express disdain for the abusive behaviour, she couldn't do much to help me.

Ihave to deal with my pain on my own.

Upon the out come of the investigation, I will seek to see what changes I can make to the system in any by penning aletter to the Ombusdman of Ontario or some body of authority. The problem is the College needs to recognize that ending a therapist- patient relationship is not easy, secondly they need to make it easier for patients to complain, and thirdly they need to educate patient on a regular basis of their rights, and encourage them not to feel intimadated about complaining about a situation which they feel is potentially harmful - in this case, my therapist regularly put me down by calling me derogatory names such as "slut", forced me to say that I am a sick F**&.... and told me repeatedly that I can't handle life and that I am hopeless this was before , after and during he acted in a sexually inappropriate way with me.

 

[MHealthJo]

My heart goes out to those of you who have experienced wrong things and the process of getting out of it, getting through that, complaining, etc...... Your perspectives you have given here will be very valuable to others. Thank you so much.

I really respect the things you want to do to improve things over there (I'm not from Canada). I think you'll make a difference.

 

[texasgirl]

I was raped by my psychiatrist while I was in hospital. He took me out of the hospital under the pretense that a pass would be helpful to me. I believed that he would kill me if I didn't perform. He dropped me off and threw me out of his car at 3:00 am and threatened me if I told anyone. I won't go into further details except to say that he had a haldol shot ordered for me when I went upstairs in the hospital and had called in an overnight pass for me to the nursing staff. I did tell except that I thought it was a plot or some kind of bizarre therapy at the time. He was fired. My family did not want me to pursue changes because of the potential publicity which made me very sad. In any case I moved on with my life but I never really got over it and still have nightmares all the time. I admire anyone who pursues these doctors because they will do it to others if they are not stopped.

Tg

 

[gardener]

TexasGirl, That is absolutely horrible what happened to you, I'm so sorry! You too were strong and brave enough to tell, so thank you very very much.

I can relate to your statement that you believed that this was some kind of bizarre therapy... I stayed with abusive therapists way too long because I believed the same thing. Therapy was hard I was told, so I stayed and took more and more of it instead of running, like I should have.

People going thru mental health therapy need advocates looking out for them, it is just stupid to blindly trust a system like this one.... This is what they do in the Canadian Children's Aid.... and it's a perfect place for child abusers to practice their sickness as well... It is sad and pretty much useless that all people really have (here in Canada anyway) is the umbudsman - AFTER the fact....

It is this part that bothers me the most about these creepy criminal therapists... They have very confused (and therefore very vulnerable) clients... I was perfect for an abuser because I couldn't believe that yet another care-giver was abusing me... Dissociative as I am, and then simply just unable to comprehend that I somehow found my way into the hands of another abuser. Incredible denial can happen at such a time. It's too horrific of a reality.... "Normal" people simply cannot understand this type of thinking, but the confusion that you feel at this time (not comprehending the abuse as abuse, but confusing it for a bizarre therapy) is very real... You are not alone there....

People who would take advantage of such a vulnerable confused individual are the lowest of the low in my opinion. And they are schooled in this, so they totally understand what they are doing.... and they do not have to go as far as sexual abuse to do a lot of damage either.....

Thank you for sharing your experience here also. Again, I am so sorry that all of that happened to you.

I wish more people could read stories like this to know what the mentally ill go thru sometimes in their search for simple wellness.... I really don't believe it is that random in a field like this, where it is just too easy to abuse someone and get away with it.

It's easy to hate someone like me...and therapists are just humans...flawed like the rest of us.... and sometimes the therapists are MORE SICK than the patients they abuse.... in my experience, it isn't that rare of an occurance.

Again, I'm so so sorry to anyone here who has experienced this...

 

[texasgirl]

Thank you, Gardener. I don't know what motivated him, but I was an inpatient and I had no ability at the time to even refuse medication that he ordered after the act (or so I thought). To me I was the one at fault. And this is what is also so bad about these doctors.

 

[MHealthJo]

I am so sorry Texasgirl, and Gardener.....

I guess the biggest thing for other vulnerable people to know is that therapy will NEVER involve anything weird or disrespectful or nasty or abusive. Anything weird, disrespectful, or nasty, anything that comes under any categories of abusive behaviour or abusive communication, is NEVER some kind of 'test' or 'pushing you' or 'part of the therapy'.

(And I guess some folks have rarely or never been treated in a way that was not weird, disrespectful, or abusive. So will they have the ability to know or see when this is happening? It's like a catch-22 - you may need some level of therapy or education to understand these things; but at the same time you want to understand certain red flags at least a bit, at the point of going!)

I guess if vulnerable folks are reading.... the only thing to EVER be okay with, that is 'part of the therapy', is respectful, honest, direct, clear, above-board talking and listening, about you and your life and your thoughts and feelings and options, and always leaving plenty of physical space between you, etc.

And any modalities that are more creative or unusual than that, they must be totally above board, talked about beforehand, it must be a known respected treatment modality that you can read about in a psychology journal etc (unless, I suppose, you have sought out some sort of complementary or alternative thing that you have looked into and are completely okay with), and done only if you have thought about it and are totally ok with it, no pressure etc; and you should feel totally free to talk the idea over first with someone else or go away and look it up/research it first if you want to, etc.

Maybe people who are really concerned, can also be sure to choose a therapist who works from a multi-practitioner office perhaps, with multiple other staff around at all times? And ask for the door to be left a bit ajar maybe?

Are there any other ideas or precautions one could take? Are there some therapists who are happy to tape each session and immediately give you a copy, or something, for example?

I guess this is not possible under all health systems, but maybe finding someone through a recommendation of some sort, could be another possibility?

And of course it's still possible that a bad person could find a sneaky, clever way to do a bad thing; and if something wrong happens, it is never, EVER deserved or your fault. But knowing what's okay and not okay in the first place is still helpful, for other vulnerable folks.

Wow, there really needs to be lots of services and watchdogs in each country to watch over this stuff.....

Hmm, I wonder if it will ever be the case in some distant future that all therapy or medical services will be done with a randomly assigned observer or 'quality assurance' person present.....? I wonder if that is a possibility. In a similar vein, a lot of phonelines in my country now have a message that the call might be recorded and listened to for quality assurance, but you have the option to refuse this if you want to.

 

[gardener]

MHJo, I doubt quality assurance will ever be a high priority for any health care practices in Canada, when I said that people need advocates... I was referring to the fact that I won't even go into a doctor's or therapist's office without someone I trust with me. It's quite interesting how a third person in the therapist's/doctor's office will get you better/calmer/more focused treatment.

Also, respectfully, I find your comment "therapy will NEVER involve anything weird or disrespectful or nasty or abusive. Anything weird, disrespectful, or nasty, anything that comes under any categories of abusive behaviour or abusive communication, is NEVER some kind of 'test' or 'pushing you' or 'part of the therapy'. " to be incorrect. I know of entire psychiatric programs that expect you to take being verbally harrassed at a local Psych hospital. I live in a rural area, and the people working in my local mental health office are a cliquey bunch of hillbillies, related to many of the people who bully me in my community. I have to travel one hour to the nearest city for a psychiatrist, and quite honestly, the choices I have there are not much better than the ones I have here.

I read responses like yours MHJo and wonder where it is that I need to move to to actually get an environment like you describe..... free of such rough treatment, and the follow up expectation that you will not only shut your mouth about it, but be grateful you are even allowed to participate!

Obviously, not everyone gets the same treatment in the mental health system.

 

[GDPR]

I appreciate this thread.

I have decided that if I am ever abused again,in any way,by a 'professional',I am going to speak up,speak out and do something about it instead of finding fault in myself and beating myself up for it.