Dealing with trauma in therapy

[Halo]

Pocono, I completely agree with TL and can say that when you feel that you are losing the insight that you have achieved or need reinforcement all you have to do is log on here and you have many of us that will help you hold onto what you have learned.

We are here for you when you need us to be
:hug:

 

[pocono]

I did something important today I think. I put the "bad things" that happened to me and that I did between ages 15-25 in categories and on a time-line. I've wanted to do this for a while, but I haven't been able to think that abstractly about the events. I also have been too ashamed of the categories (ways of describing what happened and what I did.)

I went to my therapist's office 30 minutes early and wrote in his waiting room. It felt safer there than doing it on my own, and I needed the full-time during my hour to process what I had written.

It does feel like I'm making lots of progress quickly. Is this ok? Am I going to crash? Am I alright to be doing better after doing so poorly?

 

[David Baxter PhD]

That sounds like it ight be a very productive exercise, pocono.

What do you think you got out of it?

 

[pocono]

Dr. Baxter:

About a year ago I had written a list of mens names on a piece of paper during a session. This was the list of guys who had hurt me or with whom I had done things I was ashamed.

I didn't remember, but I put the list in 3 categories: very scary, mortifying and not as bad.

I could not talk about or think about the whole list until today -- too overwhelming. I also could not put it in chronological order.

I didn't remember that I had actually categorized that list when I wrote it .....I remembered only the list of names. I had done it in my therapist office and given it to him right after writing it. I was very upset and agitated that day.

Today, the categories I used were different....less emotional and more descriptive. He read me the old list and we compared it. I realized I had a little more distance and an ounce more "objectivity" about the things that happened. That seemed helpful.

There was also one name on the list about whom I had not yet spoken. By putting him in his own category -- I was forced to speak about him. I disclosed and was exposed....but it was received very well by my therapist -- and I was happy not to be carrying that secret any more.

Did you read this whole thread now that you are back from your honeymoon. (Congratulations by the way.) Do you have any recommendations for other things I might read?

 

[David Baxter PhD]

I have been logging in to check the status of the forum and read threads this past little while - just not posting as much as usual.

You might find some useful resources at PTSD and Adult Survivors... especially scroll down to the Recommended Books sections on those pages.

 

[Halo]

Pocono,

I just wanted to say that I also recently created a timeline of certain events in my life that I was having a hard time remembering when things happened. I created this timeline as a helping guide for myself as I feeling confused and upset with myself for not remembering. I also gave it to my therapist (which I admit was hard) but it was a good thing to do because I think it helped him understand the chronology of events that I was unable to remember clearly.

I am really glad that you were able to take the time that you needed before your appointment in a safe environment (therapists office are great for that aren't they) to create this timeline and that you shared it with your therapist...this is a huge step forward. Good work

 

[Into The Light]

pocono it sounds like you're making progress. i am glad you're not carrying around the secret anymore. those can become a heavy burden. now it's out in the open and i bet your worries are lessened. you're doing good work