I am out of options

[SilverRaven]

Is the present situation you are now in a recurring one?, and if so, what is the cycle, and what are the similarities and causes?

I guess I dont get it...are you refering to my mental situation or my family life situation?...cause the answer to both is recurring and the cycle?..uh...I never paid attention to that other than it was at least once a year i would go through this but this is different...I have never gone so many times around in one year being this bad off...or constantly being in one state of mind...the thoughts recurring over and over like a broken record and when I try to break it I end up with a new one repeating itself......causes most are unknown I just end up feeling like this and then there are the times when my familiy gets on my nerves and start ripping on me for one thing or another...like tonight...my husband knew there was something wrong with me and knew I was in one of my moods as he calls it and still he let me walk out the door...why?...to let me do my thing I guess...I came back tonight for one reason...my son.....but I cant keep this roller coaster thing going .....I feel like a burden...I want to cry so bad and yet I cant because I am suppose to be strong..I am not suppose to be like this.....I am a mother a wife a daughter a sister a grandma...and a granddaughter..I am suppose to be the one supporting them arent I ?...then why am I such a disaster...why after all these years i am no closer to being normal but gettting farther in the hole?...there really arent any similarities other than it usually something said or done to trigger the thoughts to go into hyper mode...and the only way to avoid them is to avoid human life all together and thats not possible...my cats are even avoiding me that makes me feel oh so much better...

 

[Retired]

Silver Raven,

Your priority has to be to get some local support and medical attention. Do you have a trusted friend or family member who might be able to assist in making some phone calls to local service agencies on your behalf? You might even try contacting a local womens' shelter for information on local support agencies. Are you anywhere near a teaching hospital or public hospital that might have a facility that can provide free service to you?

In what part of Virginia are you located?

 

[Daniel E.]

On that note, it may help to expand your search to towns/cities that are within 1 or 2 hours of driving distance. In the rural area where I live, many people here, including my parents, often have to drive almost 1.5 hours to see a specialist.

As a reminder, you can search the United Way's online database by state and city: 2-1-1 Search

So if you live near another state, it may help to search by different states as well.

 

[SilverRaven]

On that note, it may help to expand your search to towns/cities that are within 1 or 2 hours of driving distance. In the rural area where I live, many people here, including my parents, often have to drive almost 1.5 hours to see a specialist.

As a reminder, you can search the United Way's online database by state and city: 2-1-1 Search

So if you live near another state, it may help to search by different states as well.

I have been doing alot of reasearch into areas outside my village...everything seems to be centered near the southern part of the state and so arent the hospitals that offer help in this field...I did the 211 search a few times and still am checking more..united way also pointed to the southern part of the state..im still looking but I am at a point of giving up...I tried to go into town today just to get out and my truck told me nooooo high idle...even my truck is giving up on me....I seriously think something is telling me I am not to be here...every thing that has happened since being here has happened only to me or the close calls ..accidents..near misses....fate is out to get me and I am eager to let her...


and no I do not have any family here they are all back home in Wisconsin...which right now they are all being negative towards me yet again...I do not know of any teaching places here...I do not know this state so I do not know where to look for things...first priority...I am last on priorities ....I have to be...I was late on my rent this month because of my husbands mishap and expenses.....now that puts us behind on other bills...so how can I be a priority if I am going to cost alot..I think I am what do they call it a liability...to costly to keep...I been reading things on the DBT and you know my mind turns everything around to a negative...why?....using the senses and that....I find every reason to hate what i see hear taste feel...and I dont do it on purpose....my mind just pops up with why I hate it.....I know I am a complete waste but cant help it...every step forward leads to a mile further backwards......I am still looking

---------- Post added at 04:32 PM ---------- Previous post was at 03:31 PM ----------

Silver Raven,

a teaching hospital or public hospital that might have a facility that can provide free service to you?

In what part of Virginia are you located?

I live in Etlan, VA 15 miles from Culpeper...I found University Of Virginia that offers sliding scale and services to people on the 211 just a few mins ago..I am still reading the info on what they offer and such but will give them a call tomorrow ...problem is they are in Charlottesville which is alot farther off and getting there is going to be hard for me as my husband has the truck during the day for work...thats why I think he wanted to live in the boonies so I was isolated from everything I cant walk anywhere and I have no friends here so no ride from them...sighs....figures...ggggrrrrr.....why does mental health have to be the biggest headache in the world

 

[Retired]

Have you tried contacting or visiting Southwestern Virginia Mental Health Institute located in Marion, Virginia?

 

[SilverRaven]

Have you tried contacting or visiting Southwestern Virginia Mental Health Institute located in Marion, Virginia?

no I hadnt come across that one yet...thanks for the info I will call them to

 

[Retired]

Here is another resource provided by the State of Virginia:

Suicide Prevention Virginia.gov


Specifically here is some contact information from Suicide Prevention Resource Center (SPRC): Virginia State Page

Christina Benton
Suicide Prevention Manager
Virginia Department of Health
109 Governor Street 8th Floor
Richmond, VA 23219
Tel: 804-864-7736
Email: christina.benton@vdh.virginia.gov


Christy Letsom
Chair, Virginia Suicide Prevention Coalition
The Planning Council
130 W. Plume Street
Norfolk, VA 23510
Tel: 757-622-9268 Ext: 3041
Email: cletsom@theplanningcouncil.org

 

[SilverRaven]

Here is another resource provided by the State of Virginia:

Suicide Prevention Virginia.gov


Specifically here is some contact information from Suicide Prevention Resource Center (SPRC): Virginia State Page

Christina Benton
Suicide Prevention Manager
Virginia Department of Health
109 Governor Street 8th Floor
Richmond, VA 23219
Tel: 804-864-7736
Email: christina.benton@vdh.virginia.gov


Christy Letsom
Chair, Virginia Suicide Prevention Coalition
The Planning Council
130 W. Plume Street
Norfolk, VA 23510
Tel: 757-622-9268 Ext: 3041
Email: cletsom@theplanningcouncil.org

thanks alot for the information more resources to check on...sucks they are all in southern and south western virginia instead of where I am at..lol...hey I laughed...I am in Madison County so every thing I put in for my area seems to come up further south..but they might still be able to point me somewhere..thats why I am hoping UVA will be able to tell me they can offer me the sliding scale they are at least an hour away so I might be able to see if I can take the truck that far on my own...I dont like driving distances like that at higher speeds...hubby is just gonna have to part with MY truck so I can go if I get to..he can use the bosses truck for all I care...I am a worth while individual right?...so I should be able to stand up to him at least and get something I want ...if he loves me like he says...

you know last night all I did was go for a cup of coffee and my husband opened his big mouth in front of our son that I was in one of my moods and my son ended up cryinig himself to sleep because he didnt think I was coming home...I felt so bad because he had to hear his dad say something like that...I couldnt sleep all night because of that...i sat in his room watching him sleep and cant help but think why I am feeling like I am when I do know he needs me...why cant i just think things through before my mind goes bezerk and I do things impulsively...I dont want to hurt him he loves me so much and I love him with all my heart and I want to be the mother he so desperately needs....


So I am thankful for the people I have met here that have helped me out even when i am at my lowest ...

 

[Cat Dancer]

I am in Southwestern Virginia and there isn't much here either. I have to drive almost an hour to get to a therapist and doctor. It's sad and frustrating.

 

[Retired]

The reality of healthcare in North America today is that certain specialties tend to work in groups in order to pool and share their resources. Therefore, when we are advocating for ourselves and taking charge of our own healthcare we have to be prepared to go to where the services we need are available.

When I needed specialized surgery recently, I drove three hundred miles to the medical facility that provided the kind of care I needed and wanted.

So once you have located the services you need and want, you might need to figure out the best way to get yourself to that facility.

 

[Cat Dancer]

That is definitely true. I know in some counties they have rural transportation buses. That might be something to look into.

 

[SilverRaven]

I am in Southwestern Virginia and there isn't much here either. I have to drive almost an hour to get to a therapist and doctor. It's sad and frustrating.

back home there is help in pretty much every town and city...but here its like nobody wants to deal with mental health.......very frustrating ....I talked to a woman who is in Marion and she didnt know of any help..but yet according to the site I looked at from below its in Marion so I dont get it.....not sure where that is but everything else is like 68 miles and farther...grrrrr...but I contacted the two places below and left messages so maybe I will here something today back from them...if I don't then I understand...

 

[Yuray]

Since you first posted this thread on Nov 8, there has been a lot of interaction, and disclosure on your part. It appears that your 'out of options' thinking is still being worked on, and answers trying to be found. Do you feel any better as a result of so many people trying to assist you, and has your mood changed a little for the better? (even a teeny weeny bit?)

 

[SilverRaven]

Since you first posted this thread on Nov 8, there has been a lot of interaction, and disclosure on your part. It appears that your 'out of options' thinking is still being worked on, and answers trying to be found. Do you feel any better as a result of so many people trying to assist you, and has your mood changed a little for the better? (even a teeny weeny bit?)

I feel a wee bit better ..and I dont..I appreciate all the help..I am trying to fiind something..and when I think I am starting to think positive ..someone knows just what to say to shatter those thoughts..and back down I go...and I dont know how to make him understand anymore....I keep looking at things on this site and others that I might be able to use to distract myself even for a little bit...I never knew that people could exist in far places that could care for someone else they didnt even know an would try to help...I ha ve a big trust issue and never know if someone is genuine or not anymore but seems this place is different

 

[Retired]

I dont know how to make him understand anymore

As has been said before, your focus at this time should remain finding help to deal with your own mood, and to regain your strength and confidence. Taking one thing at a time, once you are stronger and can see things more clearly you can then work on your relationship with family members. Your priority must be to get help for yourself, and not to deal with relationship issues at this time.

You are doing well to make the contact calls, explaining your situation and working on finding help. You are taking charge of your own healthcare, and hopefully your efforts will find a solution.

 

[Retired]

Silver Raven,

Here is the resource than can get you the help you need in Madison County:

Rappahannock-Rapidan, the local County service Board for Madiason County. (540) 825-3100 I am told this office can find you the help you need either at no cost or on a sliding scale.

If you are in crisis and require immediate assistance, the crisis number for Madison County is (540) 948-5911

If you require further information feel free to contact:

Christina Benton
Suicide Prevention Manager
Virginia Department of Health
109 Governor Street 8th Floor
Richmond, VA 23219
Tel: 804-864-7736
Email: christina.benton@vdh.virginia.gov

who has been kind enough to provide me with the information on Madison County.

Please keep us informed on your progress.

 

[SilverRaven]

You are taking charge of your own healthcare,

one of the problems with taking charge of my own healthcare is to get my husband to understand how important it is..if I cant get him to understand that I need his help finacialy if it comes to that I wont get the help I need...he is being a road block to...he said it last night I am the bread winner in this house and I pay for everything so if i dont think its a necessety it doesnt get paid for...so ok I am trying to take charge but when I have him interfering I have to find some way of getting through...so I am taking things one step at a time so to speak..first making the calls second getting him to pay for it

 

[Yuray]

so I am taking things one step at a time so to speak..

The first step leads to the biggest obstacles. After that, stepping becomes less difficult, and more rewarding.:2thumbs:

 

[SilverRaven]

The first step leads to the biggest obstacles. After that, stepping becomes less difficult, and more rewarding.:2thumbs:

well its that obstacle that is going to be a hard one to step around...I am still waiting to hear from these people but I am getting impatient..grrr..patience was never my fortay

 

[SilverRaven]

ok so I got a call today...I got an appointment.....FEBRUARY 15 TH.......ok now thats a long ways off.....so I overcame the first hurdle but now I am still in a rut.....my feelings are still strong and I have been staying busy....how do I keep going for three months?....my brain cant plan that far ahead...grrrrrrr...wish I was a dragon instead....mg::hide::bonk: that about sums up my emotions that are running in my head all at once