this is such a great site. i am glad i found you. i feel compelled to share an experiene about marriage, outsiders and the decision to leave. when i left my husband no one was happy and it was very violent. my father tried to run me down, my parents disowned me and took in the husband, my grandparents threatened to disinherite, i was faced with the options of being institutionalized, loose my kids and and. after thinking about it, i knew i was right and they were all wrong and i could not leave my kids in that environment (for the sake of the children). so i took them and left. i am still here 20 years later, the world didn't cave in and i still won't lay down and die for a man(my life long saying). thank you very much. this has for the moment put things into perspective. thank you))