the situation: my daughter (20 yr old) told me that she's moving in with her boyfriend (who lives with his mom). she is now living with her dad. for the past year or so she's been trying to find ways of being more independent. she signed up for the national guard and left for basic training but two months later she was back because of health problems. she is now studying and has applied for housing at the university. she was told that there is a waiting list. when her boyfriend's mom offered that she come live with them, she agreed.
my thoughts: i think it's a mistake. she is looking for a way out of her dad's. she wants independence but is going to move in with people who are not going to foster that. i feel horrible that i can't offer her a place. there is some jealousy on my part because i want her to be with me. but aside from the jealousy i truly don't think it will be good for her.
my family is advising me to get her to change her mind. we don't agree on parenting issues. i believe i should respect her decisions, even if i think they are a mistake. but my family thinks i should try to change her mind and force the issue.
i'm torn. i love my daughter and want whatever is best for her. i'm not even sure what my question is... i guess i'm asking for advice on how to handle this situation. should i let her move and find out on her own what it will bring? should i listen to my family and try to convince her not to?
my thoughts: i think it's a mistake. she is looking for a way out of her dad's. she wants independence but is going to move in with people who are not going to foster that. i feel horrible that i can't offer her a place. there is some jealousy on my part because i want her to be with me. but aside from the jealousy i truly don't think it will be good for her.
my family is advising me to get her to change her mind. we don't agree on parenting issues. i believe i should respect her decisions, even if i think they are a mistake. but my family thinks i should try to change her mind and force the issue.
i'm torn. i love my daughter and want whatever is best for her. i'm not even sure what my question is... i guess i'm asking for advice on how to handle this situation. should i let her move and find out on her own what it will bring? should i listen to my family and try to convince her not to?