Hopefully I'm not being too forward for sharing.
Mom's. They work a nerve often but I'm fortunate I have a cool one.
The problem is my mom is a control freak to the umpth degree and always has been. She doesn't cry or raise her voice. We were schooled to be brave and show no emotion in public. She's tough so we had to be tough. Not physically but the old don't ever let them see ya sweat.
Well, I'm a blooming Pisces. I cry. I cry for the homeless people I pass. I cry for the elderly who are forgotten. I cry for the little kid being teased by the creepy bullies. I never quite got it down how not to be a blubbering idiot.
So, my psychiatrist helped me with this. Ya see being like my mom is not all a bad thing. It can work in your favor many times. BUT, it explains alot about how I react to things.
"She makes the snowballs and I throw them". That's what he said. Example being my mom will be livid with someone. Therefore she either remains in a relationship with them and waits it out or totally makes ya disappear. I give her huge kudos for that one. You screw her over and she says beat it you are assured she will NEVER speak to you again.
Well, I'm the sounding board and for those she remains in the relationship with I go right to the source and tell them. By the time she is done ranting about how they wronged her I'm in a fit. I'm knocking on thir door and telling them they best get it straight and apologize.
So, that makes me the nasty one. Then my mom would say "See, you have no decorum. You should not let them know how you feel". I throw the snowballs.
Figured this was a family part and perhaps it could be of some use to somebody. BTW, I'm a full blown adult and to this day both my one sibling and I listen to her. She had a heart attack and told us not to call the ambulance. We didn't. She didn't want the neighbors to see her in that position. Luckily we called my other sibling and he's in charge and he got the ambulance here and she was mad later and he said too bad. Not me. I don't want her wrath on me. More snowballs.
Mom's. They work a nerve often but I'm fortunate I have a cool one.
The problem is my mom is a control freak to the umpth degree and always has been. She doesn't cry or raise her voice. We were schooled to be brave and show no emotion in public. She's tough so we had to be tough. Not physically but the old don't ever let them see ya sweat.
Well, I'm a blooming Pisces. I cry. I cry for the homeless people I pass. I cry for the elderly who are forgotten. I cry for the little kid being teased by the creepy bullies. I never quite got it down how not to be a blubbering idiot.
So, my psychiatrist helped me with this. Ya see being like my mom is not all a bad thing. It can work in your favor many times. BUT, it explains alot about how I react to things.
"She makes the snowballs and I throw them". That's what he said. Example being my mom will be livid with someone. Therefore she either remains in a relationship with them and waits it out or totally makes ya disappear. I give her huge kudos for that one. You screw her over and she says beat it you are assured she will NEVER speak to you again.
Well, I'm the sounding board and for those she remains in the relationship with I go right to the source and tell them. By the time she is done ranting about how they wronged her I'm in a fit. I'm knocking on thir door and telling them they best get it straight and apologize.
So, that makes me the nasty one. Then my mom would say "See, you have no decorum. You should not let them know how you feel". I throw the snowballs.
Figured this was a family part and perhaps it could be of some use to somebody. BTW, I'm a full blown adult and to this day both my one sibling and I listen to her. She had a heart attack and told us not to call the ambulance. We didn't. She didn't want the neighbors to see her in that position. Luckily we called my other sibling and he's in charge and he got the ambulance here and she was mad later and he said too bad. Not me. I don't want her wrath on me. More snowballs.
