3 Positive Things Part 7

[gooblax]

1. Finally dragged myself to the grocery store and got about half the things I wanted to get, due to grocery volume vs bag size.
2. They've brought in a couple of extra poptart flavours. We'd been stuck with just chocolate for a few years. Now they've given back our access to strawberry, cookies and creme (which I haven't seen since I was a kid), and brown sugar cinnamon (which I've never seen here).
3. Learned a way to make kebab without a rotisserie by freezing a raw meatloaf, slicing it, then frying the pieces.

 

[gooblax]

1. After waking up multiple times in the night feeling completely stressed out about my work project (where I'd identified an issue fairly early, but despite multiple attempts had obviously failed to communicate the issue in a way that someone would understand and take action until it's suddenly the last minute and the result could screw the entire thing), I came up with an idea to check something and think I might have found a way out. The problem (as it was from the beginning, hence my attempts to communicate it to someone who could assess it) is that it's not my area of competence so I've only got about 40% confidence to back myself with... But it's better than being 100% confident that it's screwed.
2. With that being less bad, I can feel a little bit more confident going into the registration interview that I have to (virtually) attend on Monday, where I have to convince the interviewer/s that I'm a competent professional engineer. I've been trying to study a bit about their code of ethics and stuff to prepare.
3. I think the 'talking practice' I've had with my psych has better prepared me to be able to talk during the interview without needing to have my words 100% memorised. Over the last couple of months I've realised how much more confident I am when I need to talk to people (which is why the communication failure in point 1 is extra disappointing.. but I distinctly remember one person saying "I'll have to look into that" in the meeting after I'd first explained the thing to him. So the real problem was that we didn't set an action for following it up and he forgot and I didn't remind him because that team had low resources and just couldn't get time to work on the project until the last minute... which is finally when the problem was re-discovered by them). Next time I'll put it in writing and make sure there's followup, and I can at least have learned something from this.) which has likely come from practice talking to my psych without needing to have all the words written down first.

 

[David Baxter PhD]

Excellent work @gooblax!

 

[gooblax]

1. Survived the interview. I don't think anything went too wrong but he didn't give me the result, so I'll find out.
2. The relevant team at work thinks they can sort out the problem with my task. And we added a couple of extra requirements but they're not a problem.
3. Final of 3 dental appointments to get my night mouthguard.
4. Bonus: Probably gonna buy dinner on the way home to celebrate getting through the day.

 

[gooblax]

Final of 3 dental appointments to get my night mouthguard.

Ughhhh spoke too soon. There's now a 4th appointment in a couple of weeks to follow up to see how I'm going with the mouthguard and if it needs to be adjusted. At least that appointment is covered under the price of what I've already paid.

Bonus: Probably gonna buy dinner on the way home to celebrate getting through the day.

I'd forgotten that most restaurants/takeaways are closed on Mondays. I wanted pizza but all the pizza stores are in the opposite direction compared to the dentist (and Dominos would be the only one open), and the grocery store didn't have any reasonably priced ones that are an ok quality (like if I'm buying a grocery store frozen pizza, I don't want to pay more than $5 and don't want the store-brand ones because they never seem to have any proper flavour to them).

 

[David Baxter PhD]

Well that sucks. When you get your mouth watering for pizza and the pizza places are all closed it's like a slap in the face with a large slice of pepperoni.

Sometimes, I feel nostalgic about my student days in Montreal where certain restaurants and take-out places almost never closed. I could work on my thesis research in the middle of the night until the wee hours of the morning (for the quiet... my subjects were rats and mice in mazes at the time) and then walk over to Ben's Delicatessen at 3.30 am for the best smoked meat on rye and the best dill pickles in the city — and not just for takeout either: I could sit at a table and get a decent cup of coffee or two and stay as long as I wanted.

 

[gooblax]

Tbh there was only about 10% chance that I wouldn't chicken out and would actually buy pizza from somewhere, so maybe its for the best.

1. Picked up a parcel from the parcel locker. I had to ask someone where it was (because everything I looked at kept saying it was inside a 24/7 grocery store which is inside a larger shopping complex... So I went into the complex and had a quick look near the store, but decided it would be really weird if they put it inside the store itself and I really didn't have bag space to pretend that I'm buying something, just so I can try to look around to find it without looking like a total weirdo who doesn't know what they're doing... And so I decided it would be less embarrassing/ridiculous to ask the person at the desk who I will never talk to again.They were outside the building altogether.) which was successful, and the process was easy, and the stuff inside the box could easily fit in my bag.
2. My interview was successful and I got approved for the thing. Because I'm prone to misreading things when I skim over them, when the email notification popped up in the corner I merged the first 2 letters of the email subject with the end of the sentence: "Re: application XXXX. Dear [gooblax], Your application for XXXX was successful."... And I read it as "your application was REjected" until I took a 2nd look at it. *facepalm*
3. Finally lunchtime. Been waiting since 10:30. They didn't even restock the milk today.

 

[Daniel E.]

BONUS: Got a $25 air fryer on sale last week at Best Buy. I love it, especially for "fried" broccoli, sweet potato fries, and even cooking corn.

 

[Daniel E.]

BONUS #2: The almost-six-month-old kitten is now the size of a cat (over 8 pounds), and he is the most social/affectionate cat I have ever had.

BONUS #3: Papa John's loyalty/rewards program gave me $10 in "dough" for future pizza.

 

[gooblax]

1. Got through my impulsive, self destructive feelings tonight without going along with them or doing anything harmful, or asking for help.
2. Made some cookie dough that I can bake after work tomorrow.
3. It's bed time and I'm ready for bed. Good timing.

 

[David Baxter PhD]

1. Confirmed for my COVID-19 vaccinations. First dose is next Tuesday morning, April 20. Second dose will be Aug 10. Woo hoo!
2. My first and so far only grandchild will be 3 on May 16. Ordered a special gift for him. ♥️
3. Since I will have had my first vaccination by then, I should be able to see him on his birthday if we're out of the current lockdown by then.

 

[David Baxter PhD]

1. I had my first COVID-19 vaccination this morning, the Pfizer version.
2. I learned that with this vaccine I will be 90% protected from COVID after 14 days. I'm not certain how much the booster on Aug 10 will add to that level of protection - or maybe it just extends the length of time the antibodies remain active?
3. A negative: My 3 year old nephew's daycare has just confirmed 4 children have tested positive for COVID. He was tested and it came back negative. However, the family is now in quarantine and to add insult to injury he acquired another cold from daycare and passed it along to his parents.

The joys of parenting an active toddler. They just soak up bugs at that age and pass ALL of them along to their parents. I remember those days very well from when my children were young.

 

[gooblax]

1. Found out the time of my therapy appointment tomorrow because of the automatic reminder. I wasn't sure if he'd verbally told me the wrong time because of end of daylight savings. He had, but that's OK because I predicted that it was probably wrong and had decided to wait for the reminder to tell me the correct time.
2. Although something at work was due yesterday, I've mostly done my bit and just have to wait for someone else. I'm surprisingly relaxed about it and am able to just work on other stuff rather than impatiently waiting.
3. Good cycling weather. The big puddle on the footpath might dry in 2 weeks if it doesn't rain over that time.

 

[gooblax]

The joys of parenting an active toddler. They just soak up bugs at that age and pass ALL of them along to their parents. I remember those days very well from when my children were young.

Congrats on getting the first dose of the vaccine I hope there's only mild /negligible side effects for you.

My boss has been away for 2 days because of a cold he caught from one of his young kids. He's back today and our desks are side by side, so I hope he's no longer contagious.

 

[Daniel E.]

Incidentally, I was waiting in urgent care today just to get a routine TB skin test for work. And even having had the first dose of the vaccine and wearing a mask, I was so glad there was no one else in the waiting room for the most part. (If you have COVID-19 symptoms, you are supposed to enter through a side door.)

 

[David Baxter PhD]

So far, the main symptom is a sore arm. I've been sleeping most of the day because of a pill I took for some nausea which I don't think was related to the shot. But no fever or any of the other things they say are common side effects and it's been more than 12 hours now.

 

[gooblax]

1. Had a fairly relaxed day at work.
2. Went out with people from work tonight, and accepted a ride from one of them.
3. Bailed after a couple of hours when I couldn't handle how I was physically feeling due to choice of clothing (ie. a compressive singlet under my shirt, both of which I'm really too overweight to be wearing) plus maybe the carbonated drink (but I only got through less than half of it).The positive being that at least I'm not forcing myself to stay while feeling increasingly miserable. I need to work on saying bye to people rather than just leaving without saying anything, but one step at a time.

 

[David Baxter PhD]

I need to work on saying bye to people rather than just leaving without saying anything, but one step at a time.

@gooblax, I used to have the same problem when I was in my late teens and 20s.

I was still somewhat shy in those days and I didn't like being the center of attention. I also witnessed a couple of friends and siblings who were the opposite and who seemed to like to create drama and draw attention to themselves which made me wince or cringe. So part of my rationale was that I didn't want to create a fuss so just slipping out the door with a quick nod goodnight to anyone I passed on the way seemed best for me and everyone else. Of course, if it was a dinner party or birthday party I'd make the effort to thank the host for inviting me but otherwise I just went for the minimum possible fuss or drama.

But as time went on, I realized that I was unintentionally upsetting some people by doing that or hurting feelings so I started making an effort to change and eventually it became a habit.

It was similar with small talk. I hated small talk and I just avoided it and didn't participate until a close friend said that because of that people thought I was aloof and disinterested in them as people, or maybe even thinking I looked down on them. So I started participating more and actually found that I learned a lot about co-workers and such and that some of them had fascinating histories.

The common theme in both cases was that I learned I had been unintentionally hurting some feelings, and that apparently I and what I thought was more important to other people than I ever previously believed.

So then it became about doing two things that felt awkward to me but doing for THEM not for me. And of course the more I did it, the easier it was to continue doing it.

It's really another example of how depression, social anxiety, shyness, low self-esteem, and similar conditions can cause you to overfocus on yourself (negatively) to the point where you miss how it affects others around you.

Just something to think about...

 

[gooblax]

I just hate all the "why are you leaving so early? Come on, stay, you don't have any plans tomorrow morning do you?" crap it usually generates. Especially didn't feel like I could handle another few minutes in the singlet dealing with that (it kept making me feel like I couldn't breathe, which is an overreaction but not too far off as it's designed to compress/flatten one's chest). Part of the reason that I hate going out with people is that I feel like I'm stuck there and can never leave when I want to. And another part is that I don't like how I look and that turned out to be a perfect combo of suckiness.

As it was, one of them texted me to ask if I'd left. I was going to text them first once I was safely on the bus and getting away so they couldn't just walk around the corner and find me, but the bus timetable didn't work in my favour. So I did reply to them to say what happened. One of them later tried to video call me on Facebook messenger after I'd got home but I didn't answer cause it was probably just to give me shit for leaving.

 

[David Baxter PhD]

1. It's my birthday today. (WTH? Didn't I just have one of those last year?) Got to speak with all my sons and my grandson (3 years old May 16).
2. I got to Facetime with my grandson Rowan. He mooned me and his mom had to remind him that not everyone wants to hear poop jokes. 🤣
   
3. The weather has been unusually cold this past week with a bitter wind but today it has warmed up.

Bonus #1: I finally updated the home page of a client's website so they can now make edits without knowing HTML. I really can't remember why I populated the page originally with HTML widgets (I'm sure I thought I had a good reason at the time) but it was a pain to update and more than once I had to restore from backup after the client tried to update it (thank goodness for nightly updates!).

Bonus #2: I think I'm pretty much over the Pfizer vaccination side-effects now — just a bit of a lingering minor sore throat but nothing major. Just in time for chemo tomorrow.