3 Positive Things Part 6

[gooblax]

Got a public holiday today and mum's visiting from this afternoon for the rest of the week so:

1. Half the apartment is tidyish.
2. Put away my clean laundry for the first time in months.
3. Cleared the path into the ensuite so I finally won't be stepping on/over papers and shoes and clothes pegs and socks to get to the bathroom every single time.

 

[David Baxter PhD]

Put away my clean laundry for the first time in months.

Now it will be weeks before you can find anything.

 

[Daniel E.]

 

[gooblax]

Now it will be weeks before you can find anything.

I was actually thinking about that when hanging up my polo shirts along with the other polo's that I don't wear. 100% guaranteed to lose the ones I normally wear.

Haha perfect :lol:

 

[gooblax]

1. Made a good dinner last night for mum and me. It was good having a reason to make something that took more effort than normal and being able to share the work of dishes /putting things away afterwards.
2. Boss isn't coming to work today.
3. I'm really trying not to get sucked into the "should never talk to my therapist again" thought spiral and not get upset about it. I don't know how I'm going to book another appointment though.

 

[Daniel E.]

I don't know how I'm going to book another appointment though.

"Same time next week" I have usually booked appointments during the previous appointment, e.g. when money was tight every 2 weeks (with the option to book another appointment earlier if necessary).

 

[gooblax]

"Same time next week" I have usually booked appointments during the previous appointment, e.g. when money was tight every 2 weeks (with the option to book another appointment earlier if necessary).

I envy the uncomplicatedness of that approach
I just way overcomplicate it because of various thoughts/feelings. Discussed it a bit in my last session and the response was:

• I didn't have to think about booking the session until he got back from a trip he was taking (that sure would have been nice to have been able to not think about it! He got back this week but now I'm actively having to try to interpret the statement the way I think he meant it - that I didn't have to think about a session being during the time he was away - rather than the way my thoughts want to twist it - that I should have been able to literally not think about it for 3 weeks, and that I can't make another appointment until I can go 3 weeks without thinking about it at all).
• Think about the reason for the session being because of something I want to work on with his help (ie.not thinking about the reasons that I shouldn't have the session... Which makes sense except for the thoughts that I shouldn't need help for the things I would like help with, and the feelings of being overly-attached to the professional-listening-attentive-presence being disgusting, disturbing, shameful and punishable with the best form of punishment being denial of any interactions that can cause that overly-attached feeling to arise.)

 

[Daniel E.]

and the feelings of being overly-attached

Personally, I would rather risk being over than under attached. Because attachment is partly how some of this stuff works.

Generally speaking, the more common problem is, if anything, not being attached enough given the high drop-out rate in therapy.
(There are some therapists who want a credit card number before the first appointment because of the number of no-shows.)

 

[gooblax]

Personally, I would rather risk being over than under attached. Because attachment is partly how some of this stuff works.

I think my "attachment" stuff is haywire though and it's just too weird and intense. The therapy situation just makes it more difficult because it's this combination of real and pretend/fake... so I can't trust any feelings I have about the therapeutic relationship because they're real feelings on my part based on fake stuff on his part, which makes them disgusting.
And then at any point for any number of reasons he could just be like "I'm out" and that would be the end of it for him whereas I'd still be a stupid overly-attached headcase.

 

[Daniel E.]

And then at any point for any number of reasons he could just be like "I'm out" and that would be the end of it for him

It's usually the other way around.

 

[Daniel E.]

I think my "attachment" stuff is haywire though and it's just too weird and intense.

BTW:

Attachment in adults - Wikipedia

 

[gooblax]

It's usually the other way around.

Which, to me, makes my experience seem all the more weird/wrong.

BTW:

Attachment in adults - Wikipedia

I've looked at things like that but have trouble understanding/applying it to myself, although that writeup actually has more info than some of the others I've seen. Thanks.

And 3 more positive things to try and bring this back on topic:

1. Spent about 20 mins talking about waffles at work (in preparation for tomorrow being another waffle day).
2. Got picked up from work rather than having to take the bus.
3. Burger for dinner.

 

[Daniel E.]

1. My sciatica that started last month continues to get better.

2. Taco Bell is still very cheap with their $1 menu. Had dinner for two for less than $6.

3. Sick rooster survived his mystery illness and has no more symptoms. (Underlying cause was probably stress from the dominant rooster, so they each have their own bachelor pad now with a view of each other and a hen coop. We had separated them before, but this move is permanent and he seems happier now on his own.)

 

[gooblax]

1. My dad's operation went well.
2. My cousin's newborn baby is doing better after a bit of a rough few days.
3. I've been staying in bed this morning to avoid my mum (which has been nice and quiet) but I'd better just get up and spend some time with her while she's visiting.

 

[Daniel E.]

Maybe you can surprise your mother by giving her a pet gecko

 

[David Baxter PhD]

Maybe you can surprise your mother by giving her a pet gecko

Or a surprise lunch: Gecko surprise. Or gecko-on-a-stick. Sort of like a Pogo or Corn Dog.

 

[Daniel E.]

Pick one idea and save the other for next year's Mother's Day

 

[gooblax]

My geckos must have gone north for the winter so I'll save the ideas up for a future date.

I think I need a total-isolation holiday after this.

 

[David Baxter PhD]

Right, eh? House guests are exhausting.

 

[gooblax]

Human guests even moreso than the reptilian ones :lol:
Not having a car also severely limits execution of any civilisation escape fantasies. I was looking up camping sites accessible by public transport, but by its very nature that ends up being interaction-potential.