David Baxter PhD
Late Founder
Re: 3 Positive Things Part 6
What does this part mean?
What does this part mean?
- Thread starter gooblax
- Start date
gooblax
MVP
Re: 3 Positive Things Part 6
Hmm that was worded a bit confusingly.
We had a mini team chat at work cause our old-boss-turned-colleague got back from training in Europe, to update him with what's been happening here while he was there, plus share some stories. It lasted over an hour.
I'd been dreading work this morning and just feeling crap in general but this made it a bit better. I dunno if I'm bored or what but I can't seem to get into doing work.
Hmm that was worded a bit confusingly.
We had a mini team chat at work cause our old-boss-turned-colleague got back from training in Europe, to update him with what's been happening here while he was there, plus share some stories. It lasted over an hour.
I'd been dreading work this morning and just feeling crap in general but this made it a bit better. I dunno if I'm bored or what but I can't seem to get into doing work.
David Baxter PhD
Late Founder
Re: 3 Positive Things Part 6
It's starting to appear as if you are really not feeling happy with the current work situation and/or burned out where you are now and/or no longer challenged where you are now.
Either way, thinking seriously about moving to the other company with your co-worker might well be a good idea,
It's starting to appear as if you are really not feeling happy with the current work situation and/or burned out where you are now and/or no longer challenged where you are now.
Either way, thinking seriously about moving to the other company with your co-worker might well be a good idea,
gooblax
MVP
Re: 3 Positive Things Part 6
Yeah something is definitely 'up'. My worry though is what if it's just me? If I move and still have the same problem I won't even have the "gooblax used to be a good worker" good graces to fall back onto. Maybe I'm just broken now, hit my peak last year and rapid downslide from then onwards.
When I had the week of training it was good, I was able to stay engaged during most of it. So it's some poor concentration, motivation, interest, discipline, or some other mental characteristic that is lacking.
Yeah something is definitely 'up'. My worry though is what if it's just me? If I move and still have the same problem I won't even have the "gooblax used to be a good worker" good graces to fall back onto. Maybe I'm just broken now, hit my peak last year and rapid downslide from then onwards.
When I had the week of training it was good, I was able to stay engaged during most of it. So it's some poor concentration, motivation, interest, discipline, or some other mental characteristic that is lacking.
gooblax
MVP
Re: 3 Positive Things Part 6
Haha I'd like to attend a meeting to get out of work, but calling one would be too much of a stretch
Haha I'd like to attend a meeting to get out of work, but calling one would be too much of a stretch
David Baxter PhD
Late Founder
Re: 3 Positive Things Part 6
That seems unlikely. Declining enthusiasm and productivity is not usually a sign of loss of ability. Much more likely to be situational.
That seems unlikely. Declining enthusiasm and productivity is not usually a sign of loss of ability. Much more likely to be situational.
Re: 3 Positive Things Part 6
Everything went "blah" for you when the reorganization started before that you only had to deal with plain old incompetence and idiots not doing their work right like incorrect or incomplete info or unordered parts etc. That will be a fact of life that comes with having a job where you are not the only person in the company.
management, even just one clown, can make going to work with excitement a total wipeout.
Sometimes changing companies can be good but every company has idiots and morons power trippers and incompetent workers and managerial staff. Sometimes change be good sometimes you miss the morons you were working under. Not an easy decision when it’s not a change for higher level of employment opportunities and challenges.
Only advantage staying where you are is that you know the organization and it’s idiot managers. From what I’ve learned re-reorganization’s are more frequent than employee replacement in high tech industries. And competent experienced engineers with experience in a company’s structure don’t come a dime a dozen and although sometimes mistreated are a valuable corporate asset especially in your field. In other words your status is safer in the long haul than your managers’
P.S. don’t forget it’s a job not a party
Everything went "blah" for you when the reorganization started before that you only had to deal with plain old incompetence and idiots not doing their work right like incorrect or incomplete info or unordered parts etc. That will be a fact of life that comes with having a job where you are not the only person in the company.
management, even just one clown, can make going to work with excitement a total wipeout.
Sometimes changing companies can be good but every company has idiots and morons power trippers and incompetent workers and managerial staff. Sometimes change be good sometimes you miss the morons you were working under. Not an easy decision when it’s not a change for higher level of employment opportunities and challenges.
Only advantage staying where you are is that you know the organization and it’s idiot managers. From what I’ve learned re-reorganization’s are more frequent than employee replacement in high tech industries. And competent experienced engineers with experience in a company’s structure don’t come a dime a dozen and although sometimes mistreated are a valuable corporate asset especially in your field. In other words your status is safer in the long haul than your managers’
P.S. don’t forget it’s a job not a party
gooblax
MVP
Re: 3 Positive Things Part 6
Hmm. Well I just spent a solid chunk of time at home focused on something else that I've dumped elsewhere.
But the main point is that I managed to focus longer on that than I focused on any work throughout the day.
So at least that does kind of prove that it's not just related to brain power or ability as you mentioned, David.
Hopefully that means it's related to something I can get back, eventually. Just need to find out what that is that I'm missing and how to cultivate more of it.
Maybe I could go have a chat with my first manager. She predicted that I'd get bored doing the work that I'm doing now, so perhaps I could ask her why she thought that would be... and that might help get me a bit further towards sorting this out.
RE job vs. party - acknowledged, but I've manually trawled through 1000+ line spreadsheets, line by line, with more motivation and sense of purpose than I'm doing my job now (which by all respects should be more interesting).
Hmm. Well I just spent a solid chunk of time at home focused on something else that I've dumped elsewhere.
But the main point is that I managed to focus longer on that than I focused on any work throughout the day.
So at least that does kind of prove that it's not just related to brain power or ability as you mentioned, David.
Hopefully that means it's related to something I can get back, eventually. Just need to find out what that is that I'm missing and how to cultivate more of it.
Maybe I could go have a chat with my first manager. She predicted that I'd get bored doing the work that I'm doing now, so perhaps I could ask her why she thought that would be... and that might help get me a bit further towards sorting this out.
RE job vs. party - acknowledged, but I've manually trawled through 1000+ line spreadsheets, line by line, with more motivation and sense of purpose than I'm doing my job now (which by all respects should be more interesting).
Re: 3 Positive Things Part 6
1. Husband turns 60 a week from now, and his brother will be flying in to celebrate.
2. Walmart lets you order birthday cakes online, including custom requests.
3. Sleeping better.
1. Husband turns 60 a week from now, and his brother will be flying in to celebrate.
2. Walmart lets you order birthday cakes online, including custom requests.
3. Sleeping better.
gooblax
MVP
Re: 3 Positive Things Part 6
1. Another colleague got a new job offer with same %pay bump.
2. Going out after work on Friday. Will also be a negative when I get self conscious about what I'm wearing etc but for now I see the appeal of alcohol to avoid thinking about things.
3. Also had a good night's sleep and had time to eat breakfast at home before work.
1. Another colleague got a new job offer with same %pay bump.
2. Going out after work on Friday. Will also be a negative when I get self conscious about what I'm wearing etc but for now I see the appeal of alcohol to avoid thinking about things.
3. Also had a good night's sleep and had time to eat breakfast at home before work.
forgetmenot
MVP
Re: 3 Positive Things Part 6
Got to see my daughter today nurse was kind enough to let me in at noon so i did not have to return at 4 pm thankful for that
took med again with gravol 5th day now
able to keep food down no dry heaving today or nausea
Got to see my daughter today nurse was kind enough to let me in at noon so i did not have to return at 4 pm thankful for that
took med again with gravol 5th day now
able to keep food down no dry heaving today or nausea
Re: 3 Positive Things Part 6
Somehow, somewhere along the line, I got the idea you did not drink alcohol
Somehow, somewhere along the line, I got the idea you did not drink alcohol
gooblax
MVP
Re: 3 Positive Things Part 6
I mostly don't. I hate the 'buzzed' feeling cause it just makes me feel paranoid. But it's at the point of feeling like maybe it's worth going past that to see what the fuss is about and what's so good about getting drunk.Somehow, somewhere along the line, I got the idea you did not drink alcohol
David Baxter PhD
Late Founder
3 Positive Things Part 6
One or two drinks to relax and get a bit of a buzz isn't bad but drinking past the buzz is just going to make you feel worse sooner or later. And if the buzz makes you feel uncomfortable/paranoid, drinking more is likely to intensify that, not make it better.
After getting drunk and suffering the adverse effects of that in my late teens to early 20s, I worked hard at learning to pace my drinking to enjoy the buzz without the drunk and hangover.
Not very much.
One or two drinks to relax and get a bit of a buzz isn't bad but drinking past the buzz is just going to make you feel worse sooner or later. And if the buzz makes you feel uncomfortable/paranoid, drinking more is likely to intensify that, not make it better.
After getting drunk and suffering the adverse effects of that in my late teens to early 20s, I worked hard at learning to pace my drinking to enjoy the buzz without the drunk and hangover.
Re: 3 Positive Things Part 6
Definitely agree with the doc on that one except sometimes in life you have to “experience” something the hard way to understand what others are talking about.
just make sure you’re with safe people and have someone watching your back and never drink anything that you have not kept your eye on from beginning to end. That includes accepting a drink from somebody you would not trust with your life.
There’s a lot of sick puppies out there and a whole lot of stuff that can be quickly dropped into a drink.
Better overly paranoid and safe than sorry!
Definitely agree with the doc on that one except sometimes in life you have to “experience” something the hard way to understand what others are talking about.
just make sure you’re with safe people and have someone watching your back and never drink anything that you have not kept your eye on from beginning to end. That includes accepting a drink from somebody you would not trust with your life.
There’s a lot of sick puppies out there and a whole lot of stuff that can be quickly dropped into a drink.
Better overly paranoid and safe than sorry!
gooblax
MVP
Re: 3 Positive Things Part 6
I dunno how people get to "one or two drinks" before getting a buzz - I get my paranoid feeling about halfway into a first drink (which is more like 3/4 of a standard drink based on alcohol content/size). I feel hyper aware of my position in space and the space I'm occupying, feel super self conscious and it fuels my social anxiety because I start thinking that everyone else is equally hyper aware of me in the same way. It's crap for a few minutes and I have to really slow down drinking once that happens (and I may try to find some food if I didn't have any to try and reduce the effects, unless I imagine that getting food would draw MORE attention to me as if that were even possible). Completely takes me out of any conversation I might have otherwise been participating in. I can sit on the rest of that one drink for over an hour after the paranoid feeling has started, trying to chill out and let it pass, certainly not draw attention to myself, and trying not to recreate it or make it worse.
Whereas if I don't drink, I don't get that spotlight effect so paradoxically I'm much more relaxed.
I dunno how people get to "one or two drinks" before getting a buzz - I get my paranoid feeling about halfway into a first drink (which is more like 3/4 of a standard drink based on alcohol content/size). I feel hyper aware of my position in space and the space I'm occupying, feel super self conscious and it fuels my social anxiety because I start thinking that everyone else is equally hyper aware of me in the same way. It's crap for a few minutes and I have to really slow down drinking once that happens (and I may try to find some food if I didn't have any to try and reduce the effects, unless I imagine that getting food would draw MORE attention to me as if that were even possible). Completely takes me out of any conversation I might have otherwise been participating in. I can sit on the rest of that one drink for over an hour after the paranoid feeling has started, trying to chill out and let it pass, certainly not draw attention to myself, and trying not to recreate it or make it worse.
Whereas if I don't drink, I don't get that spotlight effect so paradoxically I'm much more relaxed.
David Baxter PhD
Late Founder
Re: 3 Positive Things Part 6
It doesn't sound like it's at all a worthwhile experience for you, @gooblax.
I have a family member who gets like that (also has some issues with anxiety coincidentally) but it doesn't seem to happen with cannabis. On the other hand, I have another family member who is fine with alcohol but gets that effect with cannabis.
So even with a genetic connection, you can't predict how things are goping to interact with your body and brain chemistry.
It doesn't sound like it's at all a worthwhile experience for you, @gooblax.
I have a family member who gets like that (also has some issues with anxiety coincidentally) but it doesn't seem to happen with cannabis. On the other hand, I have another family member who is fine with alcohol but gets that effect with cannabis.
So even with a genetic connection, you can't predict how things are goping to interact with your body and brain chemistry.
David Baxter PhD
Late Founder
Re: 3 Positive Things Part 6
Following on from my previous post, does it matter what you drink?
I could never drink rum (too sweet, made me feel sick) and for a while I couldn't drink beer or red wine without getting bad headaches. I was a Scotch drinker for a time but later it just made me feel shaky. I didn't tolerate rye whiskey very well either. But things like vodka, gin, or white wine were fine and later on, after I stopped drinking Scotch, I was okay with beer and red wine (not together - if I drank beer, that was all I drank).
So sometimes, if you are really interested in exploring it, you might do better with certyain types of alcohol than others. I would suggest staying away from the really sweet drinks, though, or drinks with a high sugar content, because I think personally they are more likely to make you feel off.
Following on from my previous post, does it matter what you drink?
I could never drink rum (too sweet, made me feel sick) and for a while I couldn't drink beer or red wine without getting bad headaches. I was a Scotch drinker for a time but later it just made me feel shaky. I didn't tolerate rye whiskey very well either. But things like vodka, gin, or white wine were fine and later on, after I stopped drinking Scotch, I was okay with beer and red wine (not together - if I drank beer, that was all I drank).
So sometimes, if you are really interested in exploring it, you might do better with certyain types of alcohol than others. I would suggest staying away from the really sweet drinks, though, or drinks with a high sugar content, because I think personally they are more likely to make you feel off.
gooblax
MVP
Re: 3 Positive Things Part 6
I used to not have any and just tell people that I didn't like to drink, but it was exhausting how people always seemed to make it into a Big Thing as if I was somehow ruining their fun or being judgmental because I didn't want to drink. So they took it upon themselves to try and convince me that I'd like it if I just tried their favourite drink, or if I started with A then I'd be able to move onto B. And I could never be bothered getting a 'fake drink' to pretend I was having alcohol when I wasn't - by that point, people would've grilled me over whether my drink really had alcohol or not. So when I moved into my current team at work I decided I'd just have 1 drink at the start when we went out (if it was a setting where it would be obvious if I wasn't drinking) to avoid all that, and maybe a couple more up to max 3 if we stay out for a longer time.
It was a choice to either fuel the social anxiety because of having to explain myself time and time again in the same outing without losing the plot, to people who tended to get increasingly annoying in their badgering because they had been drinking themselves... or suck it up and have a private anxiety moment but not have to constantly explain myself and people won't really notice/care that much other than occasionally asking why I haven't been drinking that much or encouraging me to have another drink. For the last 2 years I've chosen the latter and it's worked 100% of the time.
Yeah it's not the best thing. I'd much prefer a milkshake or a bubble tea. Or a milo
I used to not have any and just tell people that I didn't like to drink, but it was exhausting how people always seemed to make it into a Big Thing as if I was somehow ruining their fun or being judgmental because I didn't want to drink. So they took it upon themselves to try and convince me that I'd like it if I just tried their favourite drink, or if I started with A then I'd be able to move onto B. And I could never be bothered getting a 'fake drink' to pretend I was having alcohol when I wasn't - by that point, people would've grilled me over whether my drink really had alcohol or not. So when I moved into my current team at work I decided I'd just have 1 drink at the start when we went out (if it was a setting where it would be obvious if I wasn't drinking) to avoid all that, and maybe a couple more up to max 3 if we stay out for a longer time.
It was a choice to either fuel the social anxiety because of having to explain myself time and time again in the same outing without losing the plot, to people who tended to get increasingly annoying in their badgering because they had been drinking themselves... or suck it up and have a private anxiety moment but not have to constantly explain myself and people won't really notice/care that much other than occasionally asking why I haven't been drinking that much or encouraging me to have another drink. For the last 2 years I've chosen the latter and it's worked 100% of the time.
That's interesting. I haven't paid enough attention to notice, but I can't think of anything I've had that has acted much differently. Maybe sometime I'll try a vodka soda if I'm in the mood to experiment - the one time I've had that was after a long badgering session where I would've felt anxious regardless so I don't remember what the actual drink effect was like. But Friday it will definitely be beer because of the venue.
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